Today, I told a cashier I always bullshit with that I was getting a new tattoo. She shook her head and said, "Honey, don't get a tattoo. You'll look like a whore." I already have five. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a cashier sniffed at the money "you people" waste on tattoos. I have two full sleeve bamboo thickets to cover up old self-harm scars, but her criticism caused the self-hatred to come roaring back. Now it's a struggle to not fall back into those habits and damage that admittedly expensive artwork. FML
Today, I just had an argument with my father. He claimed that if a woman is covered in tattoos, it's quite clear that she's a whore. He said so in front of my girlfriend, who has tattoos all over her arms. FML
Today, I was struggling through small-talk at a party where I knew nobody. Tattoos came up and I started talking about trendy, girly tattoos like feathers, anchors and infinity signs with stupid words in them. Turns out the girl I was talking to had all three. FML
Today, despite my warnings and knowing I hate them, my wife got a trashy tattoo of an eye on her ankle, like she’s Count Olaf. How is she going to get a job with that thing? FML
Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML
Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML
Today, a woman yelled at me for hurting her. I'm a tattoo artist. FML
Today, I got into trouble at work because a customer complained about my face tattoo, I don't have a face tattoo but I do have one behind my ear. Nonetheless, I still got written up and had to cover it with a band-aid, which ripped out hair when I took it off. FML
Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. Fifty minutes into the tattoo on my back, the artist said, "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML
Today, I was talking to my tattoo artist about how my girlfriend broke up with me. She had also gotten her tattoos from him, so they had talked quite a bit. He told me she had been cheating on me with her ex for two and a half months. He didn't tell me because he didn't want to lose business. FML
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Top comments
poppyseed420 9
having a tattoo does not make you a *****, get all the ink you want, just make sure you get something you'll want forever
ohrlynow 9
That's ignorance at its best. Last I heard, selling sex made you a *****, not having tattoos.
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Comments (154)
dudeitsdanny 10
It's okay, OP. It's number 6 that will make you look like a suicide girl. Of course, the fact that you said you "bullshit around" with this girl made you seem, at least in my eyes, trashy, so maybe it's not the ink that's your problem. I'm picturing OP as an ugly mix of Kat Von D and Ke$ha.. With chewing tobacco covering her teeth, and her hand constantly scratching her crotch. And a greasy mullet. But it might be the surgery-strength Motrin, and my dislike of girls who say stuff like that.
BadKitty13 28
LOL ! I was thinking the same thing....... :P
Ray_of_midnight 23
Why do you care about her opinion anyway? Get all the tattoos you want.
denvan 0
Your co worker sounds old for some reason.
Candisalis 0
probably cause she said "Honey"
oooKiLLaHooo 0
duh!
tleaf 0
If her saying that was enough to make you regret your tattoos, then you have a future full of regret ahead of you.
BananaPancakesJJ 0
^Agreed
muchagente 5
seems like you found an easy way of making loads of money. your lucky day.
Jimboom 12
It will only make you look like a ***** if you get a tramp stamp.
marlie_x 8
I have a tattoo on my lower back so does that make me a tramp?
saturnfive 5
What? Why? With skin as beautiful as yours, you shouldn't taint it with ink. Such a foolish move from someone so stunning.
epyk_pryncess 8
I have 17, I'm far from done. have I been called a tattooed tramp and a tattooed ****? yes. but I know who I am and as stereotypical as people can get, I say **** them! your body, your decision. you're only a ***** if you bang for a buck!
IStoleTheCookies 16
agreed. and 17? awesome! I'm getting my first tattoo soon. for my 18th, infact. can't wait :D
epyk_pryncess 8
yeah. and I'm nowhere near done. congrats on your first! beware, they're highly addictive!
ariannarose 11
I've never understood the whole "highly addictive" thing with tats... I got one, the artist was awesome and I love it but that was almost 3 years ago and I haven't wanted another one. I drew a few up but never went through with them. lol Maybe I'm a weirdo.
Neylin 7
Well truth is tattoos are awesome, but you will have to learn to deal with people making assumptions and comments about you. Which is why ink should be used only to show something that really means something to you.
cpatrick820 3
Tattoos can go either way. It's sort of like how you speak. While "That bitch dun stole my shit-wipes" and "She took my toilet paper" may mean the same thing, one certainly gives off a stronger, different impression. Get one that signifies something personal and very close to you. It can be simple, seemingly stupid to others, or even outright offensive, as long as it holds enough meaning to be a part of you forever. Then again, what do I matter? If you want a Smurf with a 10 inch wang ****-slapping the Statue of Liberty, by all means get it.
IStoleTheCookies 16
that sounds like an awesome tattoo!
Mokiikom_fml 8
I couldn't help but think that a tattoo that says "That bitch dun stole my shit-wipes", inked all across someone's lower back, would be awesomely hilarious! XD I totally agree with your comment, btw!
marlie_x 8
don't listen up her if you like tattoos and you want them get them. it's your body do what you like with it