Today, I thought it would be funny to put some streamers on my bike handles, even though I knew they would probably be stolen fairly quickly. I went into a restaurant to eat, and when I came out both my wheels were gone, but at least the streamers were still there. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my bike was stolen. Partially. Since I always locked it up, some asswipe thought it would be funny to steal the handlebar stem and the seat, leaving the actual handlebar dangling by the brake cables. Since there was no way to steer or sit, I had to carry my bike one mile back to my dorm. FML
Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Today, I went out to where I'd parked my bike only to find that someone had stolen my bike seat. Not the bike, just the seat. I had to ride my bike two miles home in the rain like I was climbing a hill in the Tour de France, while other cyclists moved out of my way in confusion, all while trying to avoid me. FML
Today, when I locked my newly repaired bike up, I carefully took the new rear light off it so that nobody could steal said light. Somebody stole my bike. At least I have a red light to play with. FML
Today, I replaced my car's windscreen wipers, after someone stole the last pair. After I finished, I went indoors for a drink. When I returned, the new ones had been stolen too. FML
Today, I woke up to all 4 of my wheels stolen from my car. The thieves were kind enough to leave the car resting on wooden blocks and bricks. FML
Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML
Today, I decided to bike to work. I normally forget the key to my lock, so I leave it out back and hope that nobody takes it, and nobody does. I finally remembered my lock key so I chained it up. After my 7 hour shift, I walk to the back only to find the lock had been cut, and my bike was gone. FML
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
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Top comments
killer1525 20
dude its called a bike lock
mattman1994 0
how is a bike lock going to keep the wheels from being stolen?
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Comments (92)
buddymask1 0
i still think it's funny!
oogyboogy 6
ya just use a lock, where I live bikes get stolen constantly
NuMuzik 0
yeah I agree with the first comment
beachgirl332 0
who would want to steal streamers when perfectly good bike wheels are right there???
abusyboy93 0
yea because a lock would keep te wheels from being stolen right? retard
mandiexile 0
I guess they didn't think the streamers were cute or funny.
cthulhu1138 1
Get a cable or a chain. Use it to secure the wheels as well as the frame of the bike. Depending on your area, taking the seat with you is optional.
welandedonthemoo 5
streamers? how old are you lol
Maelific 0
yah that's what I was thinking. is OP 5?
00yoda4 0
OP ydi for living in California
itsxashhhxo 0
haha that sucks but streamers, really?
you_fail_at_life 0
It could've been worse. They could have taken the entire bike and then left the streamers. That would've been funny :P
your_face 15
@24 - Um, actually, yes, a lock CAN keep your wheels from being stolen if you thread it through them. @50 - Haha, I didn't read carefully enough at first and thought that was what happened xD
NatDancer2010 0
Hey I had some of those on my bike!...when i was five..?
Trupe 3
50 -If I witnessed that, I'd shit myself from laughing haha
you_fail_at_life 0
Same xD
austin95 0
24 you lock it around both wheels and chain it up too something retard
ace12294 0
why would someone steal the wheels when they could just take the whole bike. and 24 - it really depends on how u lock the bike.
AboveTheRest 6
they probably thought it was a guy and he was gay so they took the wheels.
freshcoru 0
eh chill dude. california is awesome. nothings wrong with my golden state.
Mehness 0
Shut up, 47. What's so bad with California? Not all places have a high crime rate... in fact, my neighborhood never has anything stolen from it.
00yoda4 0
I love Michigan that's why GO MI
killer1525 20
dude its called a bike lock
brittany1514 0
dude it's called oh well
mattman1994 0
how is a bike lock going to keep the wheels from being stolen?
brittany1514 0
exactly.
TaylorTotsYumm 10
You get one of the big bike lock cables and thread it through the spokes on each wheel of the bike and then lock the bike up. Voilà, unstolen wheels.
TaylorTotsYumm 10
With a saw, yeah. But that'd be kinda hard to do. :P
mrmystery96 0
a pair of bolt cutters and a 30 second interval of being unnoticed are all one needs to steal a bike. though, who would want the bike when there are those awesome streamers sitting right there? snip, snip, heheheheheeee...
hanuhhh 0
mattman, you have insanely beautiful eyes
MrCatman1125 2
He has a Grammar Nazi picture so how do you know what his eyes look like?
FweakofCydonia 40
Wheels can be stolen even if it is locked....all it takes is a little genius and it can be done. However, doing so is obviously bad.
nibawan 0
streamers. boy that's funny!
brittany1514 0
umm his wheels could still get stolen with a bike lock. but I think you set it up for your self.
dioxyde420 0
are you retarded? thread a cable through the wheels.
brittany1514 0
no I'm not thanks :)
MrCatman1125 2
By the little information we know about you, I'm going to assume you are!
PoopNuggetLeader 4
Lol 103
Football_5tar_JR 0
"Today, I saw some loser with streamers on their bike. Instead of stealing them like she probably expected, I took the bitches wheels! MLIA!"
mattman1994 0
haha niiice
derschadenfreude 5
FMLs that begin with "I thought it would be funny" are automatic YDIs
alex_cutie 0
I agreee:P
skyttlz 32
yes they are, especially ones that start with "i thought it would be funny to ____ my girlfriend/boyfriend"
JustJess666 0
what grown person puts streamers on their bike besides a retard or a gay man???? come what are you five?!
BENuke 0
that really sucks.
BENuke 0
o yea a lock would only work if both wheels were chained to the bike and then the bike chained to some poll.
airborn54 0
college smollege! join the Army!