Today, I thought it would be funny to put some streamers on my bike handles, even though I knew they would probably be stolen fairly quickly. I went into a restaurant to eat, and when I came out both my wheels were gone, but at least the streamers were still there. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my bike was stolen. Partially. Since I always locked it up, some asswipe thought it would be funny to steal the handlebar stem and the seat, leaving the actual handlebar dangling by the brake cables. Since there was no way to steer or sit, I had to carry my bike one mile back to my dorm. FML
Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Today, I went out to where I'd parked my bike only to find that someone had stolen my bike seat. Not the bike, just the seat. I had to ride my bike two miles home in the rain like I was climbing a hill in the Tour de France, while other cyclists moved out of my way in confusion, all while trying to avoid me. FML
Today, when I locked my newly repaired bike up, I carefully took the new rear light off it so that nobody could steal said light. Somebody stole my bike. At least I have a red light to play with. FML
Today, I replaced my car's windscreen wipers, after someone stole the last pair. After I finished, I went indoors for a drink. When I returned, the new ones had been stolen too. FML
Today, I woke up to all 4 of my wheels stolen from my car. The thieves were kind enough to leave the car resting on wooden blocks and bricks. FML
Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML
Today, I decided to bike to work. I normally forget the key to my lock, so I leave it out back and hope that nobody takes it, and nobody does. I finally remembered my lock key so I chained it up. After my 7 hour shift, I walk to the back only to find the lock had been cut, and my bike was gone. FML
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
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Top comments
killer1525 20
dude its called a bike lock
mattman1994 0
how is a bike lock going to keep the wheels from being stolen?
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Comments (92)
perdix 31
Poor SOMAgirl! You should have put the Kryptonite lock on the wheels instead of the streamers! Who locks down streamers?
perdix 31
I tried to post an FML with the infamous "trying to be sexy" in it. The moderators would have none of it -- they rejected it with extreme prejudice. Congrats on getting an FML through. Sorry it cost you some bike wheels. Oh, the sacrifices we make for our art! If it's any consolation, one of my rejected FML's cost me a pair of glasses.
perdix 31
I did! Hairy manboobs don't have many takers in the hallowed halls of FML HQ. They do elsewhere ;)
ciaobella_fml 0
Yeah, I gotta be honest. I LOL'd for this one. But that still sucks.
katplayer 4
You're supposed to remove a wheel and chain it to the other one and the frame. Really, don't leave your bike open like that.
immja 0
hah! sucks to be op
airborn54 0
dammit I posted my prev comment in the wrong fml
ArtIsResistance7 1
I'm surprised they didn't take the whole bike! It looks like they did you a favor. By ruining your bike, they also ruined all opportunities you had to make a fool out of yourself by riding it. "Today, I decided it would be cool to put streamers on my bike. FML"
ArtIsResistance7 1
On a side note: Didn't the 40 Year Old Virgin teach you anything? You're supposed to take the wheels off :P
Fear_Der_Nacht 0
i never laugh at fml anymore
nardvark1 0
streamers really wat are you 5 or just a mormon
triggerit 5
perhaps your streamers were really ugly
joseph11 0
sum black guy did tht