Today, I swallowed and nearly choked to death on the ring my boyfriend hid in my wine glass. It's still in me somewhere, and my doctor basically told me that I'll have to "keep an eye on things" if I want to find it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around, and he thought it would be funny to steal my ring and "pretend" to swallow it. I tried to get it back, but unfortunately I "surprised" him. He reckons I'll get it back some time tomorrow. FML
Today, I had a horribly realistic dream where I was being robbed and had to swallow my wedding ring to save it. After waking up, I realized my wedding ring is in fact gone. The doctor assures me that I will have it back in a day or two. FML
Today, I swallowed the piercing that I had bought for my tongue yesterday. FML
Today, my dog somehow managed to swallow a ring that my mother had bought me. Now I must carefully poke and search through each pile of dog crap I find in my yard for the next week. FML
Today, during lunch, I choked on my food and possibly came close to death when my boyfriend's best friend performed the Heimlich Maneuver on me, potentially saving my life. My boyfriend then started arguing with me over letting his best friend touch my stomach. FML
Today, I thought the ring my boyfriend bought for me had fallen off while emptying the trash into the bin. After panicking and emptying a week's worth of rubbish onto the ground, I found my ring safe and sound. On my other hand. FML
Today, after just having used the bathroom, my ring fell in the toilet. After stealthily removing it with a toothbrush, I went to go wash it in the sink. It then fell down the drain. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I found out that last night, when I drank a bit too much and blacked out, I freaked out about "losing my tampon in my vagina" and made my boyfriend fish through to look for it. I had already taken it out before then, and was too drunk to realize. He told me he almost called 911. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
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Top comments
brackaman 18
Hey, it's what's inside that counts.
Adeptasaurus 12
I swear, if someone says it...
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Comments (154)
vandeele 8
Aww well at least he was trying to be sweet and might I add- FAITHFUL.
kkmmdd26 5
How could you not see the ring in the glass, it was a liquid so you can see through it right?! Sorry you chocked though!!!
emmagoober23 2
Yeah I've never really understand the ring in wine glass it's cute but well what if someone swallows it! At least this will be a story to pass around
TunaFireStarter 16
Haven't any of you ever accidentally swallowed an ice cube from your drink? A ring is a little different, but I sounds like it could happen if one wasn't paying attention and was gulping the drink.
vuduguru 5
#96 she obviously opened her throat and slammed that bitch
TogeBara 12
To anyone that wants to do this "romantic gesture," place the ring in your own glass. Toast between the two of you to your love or something and hold the glass up to her. During your toast point it out and pop the question. It's safer and just as romantic for her to glimpse the ring in your glass as it is hers.
GingerNinja 18
I'm pretty sure you just stole that from two and a half men. no one would actually down wine as if it were a shot.
fangcutiepie 9
Congratulations anyways
si3g3master 1
well it seems that op took it like a shot, making the time with the "fiancé" less painful?
Reemalpha07 2
The only reason you didn't see the ring must be because you chugged your drink, and who the hell chugs wines except a drunk?