Today, I stepped out of my car and slipped on a fresh coating of ice on the ground. I tried to catch myself by grabbing the car on my way down, but unfortunately, I was trying to grab with the hand that was holding my car keys. I key-scratched my own car. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was running late for work. As I hurried out the door, I managed to trip over my own feet, fall off the front porch, and key my new car. FML
Today, after getting out the car and closing the door, I began walking and slipped on some black ice. In the moment of panic, I grabbed onto my car wing mirror. Luckily, I didn't hit the deck. Unluckily, the wing mirror broke off. FML
Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML
Today, I lost control of my car on a patch of ice and slid off the road, messing up my car. I was working on a news story about bad road conditions. FML
Today, I thought I'd wear my snow boots so I wouldn't slip on the ice at work. I crashed my car because I can't feel the pedals with my boots on. FML
Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML
Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML
Today, I sneaked out of work early. I tripped over my own feet while walking up to my car. As I fell, I managed to hit the panic button on my car keys, setting off my car alarm while I lay flat on the ground in the parking lot. FML
Today, my car got stuck in a foot of snow. I tried desperately digging around my wheels to see if it would help. I was finally able to get out 10 minutes later only to realize that I had dropped my phone in the snow while I was digging and had run over it. FML
Today, I drove into the parking lot at work, and discovered too late that there were patches of ice everywhere. As I turned to enter my usual spot, I lost control of the vehicle, and despite my pleas, praying, and profanity, it glided straight into my boss's car. FML
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Top comments
chasing_adalia 0
Okay, let me explain it. The OP started to slip on ice, and tried to prevent herself from falling by grabbing the car. Unfortunately, the hand that was grabbing the car had the car keys in that. This means that the OP, when making grabbing motions, effectively scratched her car with the keys, causing a "keyed car" effect. OP fell and damaged her paint job. And other hemispheres have winter at different times than others, so it's possible for the OP to be somewhere snowy.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Except Iowa is in the northern hemisphere. Lol.
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Comments (71)
poolshark 0
FYI: If you want to know about moderation, read the rules and look in the FAQ. Allegedly, FMLs are posted 3-4 hours after they are submitted. The people who run the site ultimately choose which stories get posted, but they will consult the moderation yes/no votes to help decide.
159753 0
frootloop25: too bad even after you "fixed" your post, "get" and "don't" are in the wrong order. tsk tsk tsk.
IloveFML1 0
gayness, and where do u live cause its not icy
frootloop25 0
#23 you're too late. We already discussed that. tsk tsk tsk.
dudeseriously 0
I don't care which hemisphere it is, FYL for living in a place where there IS ice. Cold weather sucks. Support global warming, and problems like this will cease to exist.
lml86 0
"Today, I commented on a FML, but ACCIDENTALLY switched two words around. People then focused on my comment rather than the OP to boost their own ego while making me feel like my years of education were worth nothing. FML." Give her a break...it's finals week. Most of our brain cells are devoted to 800 page textbooks. Good luck frootloop :)
wow_fmylife 0
haha frootloop25 im sorry everybody is just raggin' about the small mistake you made! but #22 - i get that but the point is that the moderators are NOT doing a very good job moderating 'cause seriously this FML even made it through... ----> http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/1611254
pinkducttape 0
hopefully it didnt actually scratch the paint - just left those marks that rub off.
starvingxartist 0
i say **** your life for living anywhere with snow in may. eek.
poolshark 0
#28: I never said that I was impressed with the FML, did I? I was just responding to people who think that there was only ice where the OP lives because he/she posted this comment a while ago, during typical winter months. The fact is, some people live where it is still cold in May and some people post FMLs that happened in the past, but still have the mandatory "Today..." at the beginning.