Today, I spent several hours downtown with my violent grandma, after she was arrested for threatening a guy with a gun. His crime? "Trespassing" by ringing the doorbell and asking if she was interested in donating to charity. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to pay my grandma a visit. She called the cops because she didn't recognize me and thought I was a robber. FML
Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML
Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
Today, I came home from work to find my grandmother in my living room, demanding to know where I'd been all day. I'm 22 and live by myself. She stole my mother's emergency key to get in. FML
Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as, "Some weirdo had walked into her house." I'm that weirdo; she wasn't joking. FML
Today, I enjoyed a lovely family dinner, but my irritating grandma kept trying to buy my purse off me, and kept picking it up to look at it. When I got home I realized all my cash and cigarettes were gone. FML
Today, I was going into a store and saw a woman roughly handling a screaming toddler. I kept walking, until I heard the kid scream, "Help! You’re not my mommy!” I called 911 and stood behind the car to keep her from taking off. The cops arrived to see me fending off blows from a very pissed off grandma. FML
Today, I went to the gym with my grandma. In the span of an hour, she was hit on more than I ever have been in my life. FML
Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML
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Top comments
Wizardo 34
Well in her defence, these charity organisation names are sounding like malicious and/or terrorist organisations, I mean UNICEF, WWF, PETA! Wake up people...
dingostacy 14
Imagine what happens to the Jehovah's witnesses....
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Comments (79)
MSCCG 16
She was just standing her ground
weveallbeenthere 30
time to bit a safeand lock the guns up.
MatFox_fml 4
And americans still wonder why we think you gun laws are crazy... smh
blackonblight 33
We Americans think our gun laws are crazy. The gunmakers with the money in politicians pockets are the ones who think they're sane.
Gremlinek 16
Being born in Eastern Europe and now Living in US I will have to say that strict gun laws don't stop bandits getting guns... They do; however, stop honest people defending them self.
Brandi_Faith 34
68, I love in Canada and we have very strict gun laws, and although it doesn't stop all "bandits" from getting guns, it does make it way harder. As a direct result of our gun laws we have low gun violence and murders. Check out American gun violence (who has very lenient gun laws) versus Canada's gun violence (who has strict gun laws). Also, to say that strict gun laws don't affect the rate of gun violence is just naive. If people like to have guns and lenient gun laws, that is fine, but I don't think they should use the, strict gun laws don't create less gun violence, as an excuse as it is generally not correct.
christoph06 10
"Violent grandma" ... EPIC
noobienick 19
Granny strikes again!
niamhyo 13
Your grandma sounds awesome
Brandi_Faith 34
No, she merely sounds like she's going to kill someone.
crisanba 18
That's a bad grandma
Gremlinek 16
After hearing all those times people take advantage of seniors I totally agree with op grandma. No telling how many times they bugged her. On other hand maybe she is trying to get free health care from prison system (from what I hear it's nice alternative to most old people homes)
Brandi_Faith 34
Just because she feels "bugged" and annoyed does not mean she should just pull guns on people! Get a no soliciting sign, and if someone rings the doorbell and you don't know them, simply don't answer the door. Problem solved.
metalhead88 9
Wonder how she feels about the jahovawitness
Jayy_Dash23 9
So you are Madea's grandchild. how nice to meet you!