Today, I spent 2 hours making the perfect card for my dad for Father's Day. When I handed it to him, he smiled and said "Thank you" and then killed a fly with it. I found it in the trash a couple of hours later. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad found the Father's Day present that I spent at least ten hours preparing and decorating. I'd expected him to be extremely happy about this lovely gift. His only reaction was to ask if he could exchange it for something else. FML
Today, a wasp somehow got into my parents' house, so I went hunting for it with my dad. I found it and, after getting into position, took a strong swing at it with a fly swatter. Unfortunately, being very uncoordinated, I missed. You can figure out the rest. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, I flew home from college to see my parents. Later I found the expensive painting and hand-made necklace I mailed to my mom for mother's day while taking out the trash. FML
Today, my Dad and I killed a cockroach with a large metal pole. It was the most bonding experience we have ever had. FML
Today, I asked a coworker what she'd bought her dad for father's day. She said that she got him some flowers, and I laughed because I thought it was a rather feminine gift for a man. I later found out that the flowers were for his grave. FML
Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML
Today, I spent 3 hours making a birthday card for my boyfriend, delicately cutting each letter out of printed coloured paper. He used it as a coffee coaster. FML
Today, my son tried to swat a fly with a hammer. Our apartment walls are now littered with dents and holes. FML
Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML
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Top comments
89_Sparkly 7
that's so mean!!
YacL 15
I bet if it had a naked chick on it he wouldn't have thrown it away, mind you it'd probably be really awkward.
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Comments (175)
89_Sparkly 7
that's so mean!!
Iamnotmyself 17
****** dad is a grade asshole asshole. Wise up and don't bother making one! Give him deodorant next fathers day if needed.
6joe9 0
he threw it because it was hand-made !! Next time just go buy one from a store !
Termites 15
That means it's time to kill him and collect the insurance money.
flockz 20
how come everything is mysteriously getting ruined by the deaths of flies? O.o
BelleElle_fml 5
Your dad's a jackass.
boyguydudemalema 0
At least he used it. Instead of throwing it straight up.
YDI__Bitch 0
what a jerk!
salvyluv 0
poor fly :(
NOLA_Darling504 0
FYL, OP. :(
sexxxysydney 14
At least he said thank you? /=
Idonebeenhad 17
Unrelated - but did the Fml about the triplets get deleted? If so, **** YOU MODS!
gabe2014 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
u guys are calling him an asshole. he might have had reasons for his actions. he might have wanted to kill the bug and used the first thing in his hand. as for trashing the card, he might have spilled something,been throwing away documents and the card was on top, etc. there is several possible reasons for his actions
theten_fml 9
a dead fly should go in the trash
urdirtyolduncle 15
85-- No.
Monii_Harlz 11
:( the best thing you can give to a parent is something hand made with love and time - I'm so sorry to hear he threw it out :(
TheTerenity 9
That doesn't mean jack a-hole! The writer was being nice by making it by hand, not from a retail store or anywhere else! So STFHU!
TheTerenity 9
Sorry I was talking to 6joe9
6joe9 0
go to hell asshole !
DaveP 0
why are you looking through the trash? who takes 2 hours on a father's day card? I'm calling fake
DaveP 0
moderated for telling the truth? that's not on, this is clearly fake cause who takes 2 hours on a fathers day card? and why would OP be looking through the trash?
st0815 9
A gift should be about the person you give the gift to. Does your dad care about cards normally? Very few men do. Does he keep cards around usually? Look around, it should be easy to spot. Chances are: you gave him a boring gift which he didn't enjoy, and you spent no time thinking about the kind of gift he would like. So now he had to pretend to be happy about a piece of cardboard and probably had to put up with a moping daughter as well. Next time you want to give a gift to someone (anyone) think about what they would like to receive. Learn what they like to do, what kind of music they enjoy, whether there is something they'd like to have but for some reason don't want to spend money on. With that knowledge you'll be able to pick a gift which they won't just have to pretend to like.
mr_miyagi 0
that sux yo
starrysky4 0
yeah....that's why I just buy store cards. and then do something really nice that he can't throw away
6969awesome 0
It's fathers day?
YacL 15
I bet if it had a naked chick on it he wouldn't have thrown it away, mind you it'd probably be really awkward.
mahomie97 7
haha truee(:
Jacobt24 19
If it took 2 hours it better have had some pop-ups. An if it did, it go go with your idea with the lady. Would go right to his bedroom.
atthegates 0
awkward if u are 15 maybe....
1215116a 14
Its would be awkward because with a naked women card because Op is a girl. XD
1215116a 14
Happy Father's Day! :D
richard121212 0
well that's some dad of yours
xPsYcHO_KILLa_x 0
aww shucks put money in it then when he throws it out say there was money but now its too late
IWarnedYou 0
I would of cried :(
grafixxx687 0
i live overseas so i texted my dad at 7.30am to make sure i wished him b4 any of my sisters..i wrote him a nice long msg about how i miss the days he used to call me his little princess n to me he is the best dad in the world..i didnt call cz he was sleeping..i called him a few hrs later but no reply..at 8.30pm i got a rlly mean text from my dad sayin it only takes a few seconds to txt n wish him..i said i had done..i was the first one..n just to prove it i resent the txt but he didnt believe me DESPITE the time stamp clearly written nxt to the txt..he thought i wrote it just then..he called me a liar n hung up on me which hurt my feelings alot n i did cry..i cried like crazy
Shadow_Phantom 26
If you typed everything like that, maybe he didn't want to read it. (Though it's still a jerkass move...)
BB_ava 0
8, you mean 'would have'? There's no such phrase as 'would of'.
jennabug0403 4
thats a dick move right there .. i woulda balled .
GLiTTeRz 0
omfg I hate grammar Nazis. get over the spelling. your a troll.
richard121212 0
#65 what?
grafixxx687 0
well it was a medium sized msg..not one line and not 10 paragraphs
bonnie_vb8 5
Haha my dad did that with the card I gave him, but he killed a fat ass spider
999pun999 0
i do the same with cards i get......... though i hate to say this, in the world we live in we won't need much other than money and cards and things end up cluttered and sort of a nuisance, next time get him a gas gift card ^_^
skidoo800HO 2
Well.....at least he said thank you...
Marcinator87 4
what if he doesn't drive
Getxscared 0
At least he used it with a purpose