Anonymous
Rockville, United States
Today, I sliced my finger on a frozen chicken cutlet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
figgy
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Slice and dice
Today, I was working in a deli when I cut more meat than I intended; I basically removed my fingerprint via the deli slicer. FML
5p4571k
Chilliwack, Canada
Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML
Anonymous
United States
Frozen 3
Today, as I was putting groceries away, I went to open my freezer door which randomly gets stuck by giving it a good tug, and a frozen hamburger fell on my right foot. My right foot, which is currently healing from a sprain I got a couple days ago. FML
freakingow
United States
Today, I opened the freezer for some Poptarts and a giant block of meat fell and broke my toe. FML
Anonymous
Put it away
Today, I managed to cut myself twice with a Swiss army knife. Stabbed in one hand and sliced a finger on the other. Good to know it's super sharp. FML
cheeseless
Milwaukee, United States
Today, I sprained my wrist while trying to grate a block of frozen cheese. FML
Ouch
Getting a head start on the Halloween look
Today, while washing dishes for my friend, I managed to break an unbreakable glass and slice my hand open on it. FML
Anonymous
Large spread
Today, as I went to put a portion of a rotisserie chicken in the microwave, the rest of the chicken slid off the counter. I instinctively tried to catch it with my foot, which resulted in me punting it into the kitchen ceiling fan. FML
ouch.
Stamford, United States
Not my day, is it?
Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML
Anonymous
Gammon
Today, while demonstrating our new meat slicer at work, and after sharpening the blade at the end of the demonstration, I noticed some metal powder. I grabbed a rag to wipe it off, not realizing the blade was still in the “open” position. I now have six stitches and a really painful finger. FML
Top comments
Mynamewontfi 40
Well, the cutlet lives up to its name.
derpyshy 16
Make sure to wash up with lots of antibacterial soap. I work in grocery and have cut myself on bagged ice multiple times. Shit's like bagged glass. Hope you heal up quick.
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Comments (55)
MedChew 19
El pollo Diablo be like Bawk bawl bawk m*f***a
lexred 30
That's weird.
A07 48
It's the things we love most that hurt us
worldclassrager 41
That's ironic...
trulypar 34
If this was a comic book type story you'd wake up in the morning with super chicken-like abilities...able to squawk at super-sonic levels and scratch and peck enormous holes in the ground. Super Chicken!!!
TheNewGuy03 29
Not sure if you're cut out for the task of eating that chicken
sousaphonist 14
How...how is that possible?
KaidensCrow 18
lol... instant salmonella
timaeusTestified 15
Just because the chicken is frozen doesn't automatically mean that OP is getting salmonella.
hellnosucka 27
that is one vengeful chicken.
Tejanoswhy 19
I'm too much of a chicken to do that