Today, I saw my brother's pregnant girlfriend smoking. Disgusted, I asked him why he didn't just stab her in the uterus and get it over with. He laughed like it was a joke, then cussed because he spilled his cereal. He's more concerned about spilled cereal than having a brain-damaged child. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my brother doesn't have a problem with "keeping it in the family". It's now up to me to explain why our cousin is pregnant with his kid. FML
Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML
Today, my brother's girlfriend dumped him. I overheard my mom tell him "It could be worse. Your brother can't even get a girlfriend". FML
Today, my wife and I have been trying for kids for years and nothing, yet my deadbeat brother just ran out on his third pregnant girlfriend in a row, with no intention of meeting the baby ever. FML
Today, my brother thought jumping out and punching me in the stomach would cure my hiccups. Yeah. Didn't work. FML
Today, in front of my family, my brother's wife announced that she was pregnant with their first child. Everyone joked around and said I was next. Two weeks ago I found out that I'm sterile. FML
Today, I was chatting to my brother on Skype. Out of the blue, and just as I read the punchline to a hilarious joke, he said his girlfriend had been cheating on him. I couldn't stifle my side-splitting laughter, and he's been ignoring my calls since. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my family. My brother insulted her weight so many times she left in tears. Not only does he not understand why what he did was wrong, he’s genuinely livid with me for being upset with him, to the point that he damn near slugged me when I confronted him. FML
Today, I saw my little brother drink from the milk carton, gag, and spit the milk back in. FML
Today, I was scrolling through my phone and saw a post from my nephew's mother, my brother's girlfriend. She has a swollen eye that my brother gave her. I've been telling him for months to get his temper in control, and now he's facing possible charges, and she's utterly traumatized. I wish I could cut off relations. FML
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Top comments
ohjessica 11
Some parents are unfortunately like that.
Stoneyyay 5
actually the whole smoking during pregnant wont cause brain damage, but other health issues like asthma bronchitis, emphazema, but not brain damage., Alcohol on the other hand been proven to cause many many diferent brain anomolies in the womb and even after birth...
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Comments (45)
Hi_I_am_Q 0
At least you care. Adopt the bastard!
gchartier90 0
haha the baby is a bastard
Hi_I_am_Q 0
At least you care. Adopt the bastard!
danielreader22 4
*sigh* Young people these days...
Legendslayer222 26
Don't cry over spilt milk!
sara_saturday 5
OP get over yourself.your brother probably didn't take you seriously because you were being melodramatic. in no way is stabbing a uterus like smoking during a pregnancy. yes she should stop, but geez. . .
fthku 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
For ****'s sake, why is everyone so hung up on what OP said? She obviously wasn't ACTUALLY suggesting to do that, was she? She was just trying to express concern for the baby, in her own way.
writergirl23 19
It's their life let them live it, if they get a brain damaged kid they're gonna hafta look after it for the next 18 years ...
neonblue120 6
Or they continue to be **** ups and are a burden on everyone else around them. And you're violating the right of that baby... Life liberty and the pursuit of happiness and all.
acquiesce 6
**** him & that dumb bitch smoking.
catnip1997 0
cigarettes aren't even dangerous idiot
reallytho3 11
Wow ur ignorant...
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
I think you have cigarettes confused with joints.
middlekid2 5
Your a ******* dunbass mother ******!
jaspa 0
you both are stupid both cause damage and are as bad as each other!
MwahFMLS 6
that's not a funny fml.. that's just a sad fml..
jvoytko 0
OP: My mother smoked during my gestation period. I now have 4 bachelors degrees in computer science and psychology, own my own house, and and earn over $60/hr.
BuhZinga 2
First, I can't tell if you're trying to say that your current situation is a result of your mother's habits or if you're just bragging. It's really unnecessary to give details if the issue is health of body and brain. Clearly you're not brain damaged. Second, I don't understand why multiple people have made this same comment as if it somehow disproves the OP's concern. So far roughly the same number of comments have claimed the opposite (that they know someone who WAS affected by prenatal smoking) which, based only on these comments, gives the fetus a 50/50 chance. Not exactly a green light in my book. As for OP, the way you phrased your concern with (we can only hope) dark sarcasm takes away from the point you were trying to make to your brother. If you want him to take you seriously maybe you should be serious, too.