Today, I realized just how awful my relationships have been when I discovered I emotionally connect with women on Jerry Springer. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was watching this TV show where a man was describing how much he loved this woman, how he made every opportunity to see her, and how he loved her in a way nobody else could. I smiled, because that's exactly the way I feel about my crush. Then I realized the program was about stalkers. FML
Today, I found out that the only two people I've had feelings for in years are both dating each other. FML
Today, I found out my two favorite heterosexual female coworkers are cheating on their partners with one another. I kinda wish someone had invited me. FML
Today, I'm facing the truth that the women I married, in large part to bring my long-lost family together, was too successful as she slept with one of them. FML
Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML
Today, I realised exactly how bad my social anxiety has gotten when I had a panic attack watching someone ask someone else out on a fictional show. FML
Today, I had to admit that I'm polyamorous. Well, I'm in several relationships. Parasocial relationships. With YouTubers and Twitch streamers. I talk to them through the screen. I can't remember what it's like to have real-life friends. FML
Today, I realized my friends were right about my obsession for my only son when I found myself genuinely jealous when I heard he recently got a new girlfriend. FML
Today, I realized how alone I truly was when I caught myself talking to a podcast. FML
Today, I went on a date with a beautiful woman I had recently met. Great food, great conversation, and a great connection. That is, until she revealed that she is a lesbian. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MrSassypants 34
I was about to thumb you up, but then I saw the dreaded hashtag.
TheWindowLicker 13
15- did you seriously just use a # on FML? .-.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (100)
whitey53 5
You will find someone some day op, dont sweat it too much.
YtotsDI 0
If not, there are always cats!
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
If your ******** boyfriend isn't cutting for you, then you could always go for some pussy..... Cats
lonkite101 14
If not, you could go for a bitch or pussy
Calyx_fml 22
What does OP mean?
hayyyyleyyyybaby_fml 14
Optimus Prime
Wiebeski19 5
Be like the crazy cat lady off Simpsons!
lilemmy55 10
Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!
SkoomaKi 28
Try and get support from families adter break ups and maybe try, and find a nice decent guy to date. Good luck.
SkoomaKi 28
after*
Sebastian_NG 17
Skoomaki I've always wondered how you manage to comment among the first ones in an awful lot of FMLs, are you on some app or something?
SkoomaKi 28
26 - Yes. I'm on my trusty iPod. I'm at home studying so I use FML to keep me occupied.
Sebastian_NG 17
My not so trusty iPod notifies me about new FMLs about 2-3 hours late, even when I'm on the app and it says new FMLs have been just posted, it's not true. My iPod loves trolling me.
Baconinator2000 0
Wow. I'm lucky to even get on the first page. I gotta give u props for that but also worry that all u do is read FML's
mikeofthunder 13
She doesn't just read them; she comments on them too!
SkoomaKi 28
34 - It's not all I do. I just check every now and then, I'm lucky most of the time. I comment whenever. 33 mine is the exact same - makes no sense!
42istheanswer 27
I had to turn the badges off because all it did was troll me. It really sucked. By the way your comments are usually really good, but its hard to tell what someones like until you start dating them.
llamafish 25
Really? What times are these? o.o
llamafish 25
SOMEONE TELL ME D:
llamafish 25
Fine. Don't tell me. It's not like I care. *sniffle*
KatrinaKitten 16
There are plenty more fish in the sea, as cliché as that sounds.
ch3s 4
If you are dating fish then relating to people on TV is not the most pressing issue here...
mgkgambino 3
Yeah..that's probably an issue
zachherbert 10
'you got my sister pregnant!' 'shut up, she's my sister too!' What I think of when I think of Jerry Springer.
xleanne_aLly 23
Lmfao 88. & Yess, OP that is a definite **** my life!
krad204 21
Go out with your friends, have fun. Jerry springer isn't all there is to life!
evilplatypus 39
That crap is still on?
TheMathMajor 26
Even though when it comes on I'm thinking "this is so stupid" I can't stop watching it. People like drama.
mea_iloveskiing 26
At least you don't watch twilight :)
tbenson0628 14
Finally!! some one has said it. terrible acting and plot. so many better vampire and were wolf stories out there.
TheMathMajor 26
Finally? You must be new here.
karkid619 8
Jerry episodes are still a better love story than twilight.
sjsammio 0
f
challan 19
Stop dating men from the trailer park then.
MrSassypants 34
We trailer park men prefer "the hood" if you catch my drift.
KatrinaKitten 16
Where, exactly, within the FML does it imply that OP has been dating trailer trash guys? And where, exactly, in life, have you come to the assumption that trailer trash guys will treat you badly? Not that I've had any experience with them (as you might have, explaining your spite), but half of the time it is actually the wealthier and well-to-do that treat their ladies badly as well; they just don't get as bad as a rep for it because of their social standing. #justsaying
MrSassypants 34
I was about to thumb you up, but then I saw the dreaded hashtag.
TheWindowLicker 13
15- did you seriously just use a # on FML? .-.
randomkayx3 11
Oh God. The curse of the hashtag. It's even coming to FML now? NOOO!
KatrinaKitten 16
*deletes hashtag*
esines 9
Katrina I like how you defend people from the trailer parks, then you call them trailer trash.
KatrinaKitten 16
46- What else do I call them? Indigenous species inhabited within the lovely plastic encasements of termite-infested loveliness...
KiddNYC1O 22
15- Jerry Springer implies that.
ClosetTroll 10
All's good as long as you don't start lamenting over broken relationships on Sims.