Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I awoke from a dream that I'd found an Arco gas station that had regular gas for $3.38. I actually went looking for it. FML
Today, I pulled into the gas station to fill up only to realize I had forgot my wallet. By the time I went home, got it, and came back, the price had gone up eleven cents. FML
Today, my wife and I were driving to the gas station, she let me out before she pulled up to the pumps because I had to buy some things from the store. I returned to see my wife proudly filling the tank. Smiling, she told me that diesel was cheaper than regular gas. We don't own a diesel car. FML
Today, I went to the gas station, paid the clerk, and drove off without pumping any gas. FML
Today, I have spent the last two hours at work looking for the gas pump model of a different gas station than the one I usually go to, only because I don’t want to be embarrassed if I don't know how to use it. All thanks to my crippling anxiety. FML
Today, I was sitting at home when I remembered that I desperately needed gas for my car. On my way there, I prayed that my car would make it the whole way, and was thankful when I pulled up to the pump, because I knew my car wouldn't go any further. Then I realized I left my wallet at my house. FML
Today, when paying for gas, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet back home. After a moment of panic, I managed to remember my card number. I paid, blowing the cute cashier's mind, and drove away, before my car started sputtering and slowed to a crawl. I'd used the wrong fuel. FML
Today, I realized that I spend more money on gas to go to my job than what I get paid. FML
Today, I stopped at the gas station to fill up my tank and get some snacks. I paid the cashier, then got back into my car, totally forgetting to pump the $50 worth of fuel I'd just prepaid for. Too bad I didn't realize until my car came to a sputtering stop about a mile down the road. FML
Today, while pumping gas, I stopped to think about what a failure my life is, and how badly I've treated people in my past. While deep in thought, I accidentally pulled the gas pump out too far and covered myself with gasoline. FML
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Top comments
JandTaco 13
But didn't it feel great?
Zelphoric 25
Whoa buddy, calm down :p
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Comments (91)
ArmyDoc 11
Anybody who voted fml is obviously a kid with no responsibilities. 10 cents cheaper!!? Nice find OP. Need to Snapchat twitter and insta that baby. Frame a pic and hang over your fireplace. Someday you can yell your kids.."I was there "
jstrick11223399 10
Gas prices are serious these days
tj4234 36
If this is your reaction, never come to the uk. The fuel prices here are so high it'd probably have an adverse effect on you as much as those cheap prices did. Would probably kill you tbh.
Punkpoptart1119 20
I couldn't help but laugh at that.
weiweiweiweixuan 3
dude, you are awesome.
MrBlackledge 12
There are worse combinations out there
boys_ 3
I guess you like cheap gas ?
VancouverGuy89 9
Hey 10 cents cheaper is a lot especially if you drive a gas guzzler go OP!
Witchylady 18
You might have some other underlying issues there buddy. Getting an erection over cheap gas? That's just a little too weird.
blurider17 11
Lmfao! Oh god! This cracked me up:D