Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML
Today, and as for the rest of my life, I will always have a husband whose breath stinks. FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
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Top comments
saIty 17
Just before he tries to get smoochy, pop 10 mints in your mouth. Then as you engage contact spit them all in his mouth.
perdix 31
Get a job at the local wastewater treatment plant so you can be around the smell of raw sewage all day. You'll get accustomed to it and your boyfriend's mouth will just taste like work. Or get a new boyfriend.
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Comments (195)
shooterbuddy 8
If he has dog breath ( parden me ) carry mints all the time for him . Tell him no mint no love he will learn fast.
BellaBelle_fml 23
A mint won't fix this problem.
whited666 0
I like 25's idea, but instead, Before he kisses you pop one(or a few if it's that bad) in your mouth then swap it with him.
K_kanaka 26
Just tell him straight, "Honey your breath smells like a Satan's hairy ass crack, so I would appreciate if you could brush your mouth a little bit more or at least chew more mint gum."
Keyman1212 14
Some people are literally so full of shit, that you can smell it on their breath.
P_to_the_AM 9
Funny how she says "this wouldnt be so bad"....
BritLass 15
You could talk to him honestly but with care about his problem as I'm sure he wouldn't hesitate to tell you!
RhuLynette 8
Aww that's not nice! I always tell my boyfriend when he's stinky, there's special mints and stuff you can buy for bad breathe...its a real medically diagnosable thing! Shove him into the doctors!
Btreasure 8
If you want change then do something about it. Tell him no more kisses touch or hugs until he takes care of that
Btreasure 8
I didn't mean be a jerk about or hold back on affection. I joke with my bf all the time that if he doesn't do something for me he won't get any lovin but he's a wrestler so he'll pin me and and then go do whatever I want him to do. He does the same to me. The fact that we can be honest and not have bad feelings or anything says a lot
fthislyfe 22
And it's not just about the mouth. It could be his stomach.
jgduplante 9
Buy him a toothbrush, or honestly, if his oral hygiene is that bad and he won't do anything about it then maybe you should think about moving on.