Today, I purchased an app to track my period. When my mother asked me why I got it, I told her I was going to use it so I knew when to not go on a date because I don't want to be uncomfortable during a long movie. She slapped me in the face and called me a dirty prostitute and a liar. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend asked me to start using a period tracker app so I can tell him which week of each month he needs to "stay the hell away" from me. FML
Today, my boyfriend flipped out when he saw a period tracker app on my phone. According to him, chicks only use those when they want to know when they’re the most fertile so they can “baby trap” a man. I have irregular cycles. The app helps me know when I should or shouldn’t expect a period. FML
Today, I was showing the guy I like something on my phone. My period tracking app decided it was the perfect time to tell me that I need to stock up on tampons, because I'm getting my period tomorrow. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend uses a period tracker app to find out when we can fuck. FML
Today, my boyfriend is threatening to dump me if I don’t give him all the details of my menstruation so he can track my periods with an app on his phone. FML
Today, the moment after hitting "confirm payment" for my boyfriend's valentine gift (along with some sexy lingerie for the occasion) on a shopping app, my period tracker app popped up to let me know I'll be well into my period on the 14th. I'm getting cockblocked by mother nature herself. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML
Today, I called my mom to tell her that I finally got my period. There was an awkward pause. She was at work. I was on speakerphone. FML
Today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend and I were getting serious. I quickly lied and said no. She then informed me that if things ever heated up, she would take me to get birth control. Wanting birth control, I confessed. In turn she grounded me. I'm not allowed to see my boyfriend anymore. FML
Today, I discovered a tracking app enabled on my phone so I switched it off to save battery space. Within 20 minutes my mother rang and demanded to know where I was, what I was doing, if I was with some woman… you get the picture. I'm 32 and own my own apartment. FML
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Top comments
YacL 15
What the hell? What have you done recently to put her under the impression that you're a prostitute? Other than this, because this doesn't seem like a good enough excuse.
OHnathanIO 4
If you have kids and they turned out like little ***** that's your own damn fault.
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Comments (137)
darkness4dummies 0
PMS X 2 = bitchyness
LowLives 9
I'm sorry but what?! you need an app to track when you're gonna get your period....either our youth now a days is getting more and more lazy and stupid useless/hopeless And too dependent on technology OR OP really is lying cause that response even sounds slutty as well need an app to track your period so you know when you can go on a date pfft
Alii4 2
let's face it you don't want it for the movie thingy o.O and how did she knew u wanna use it for this 0.0
lekiat 0
she has a point. sounds like you want to make sure you're getting laid on your dates
erica4759 0
my mom thought I was pregnant when I got that app. so I feel ya
redfaction 0
lol id would slapped her back and said "shit bitch...-bitch slap- then said I learned from the best" that's how you deal with that situation....
rachiieee1 0
I think that your mom shouldn't have done that. But I think that the app is a stupid idea, you actually paid money for that?! Whatever happened to calendars? You don't need to actually write period on a calendar I used to put stars and I don't even need to remember when mine is due because it's stuck in my head. This app sounds like something a old woman would have... or a 12 year old. Think how embarrassing it would be if someone looked at your ipod and it said when your period was due. -_-
usnwife 18
the only time I thought about getting it was when I was ttc, but it happened quick enough I didn't need it! I've always know the general day my period would be here, but it always varied a little. when it gets close, if I wanna go to a movie I slap a pad in just in case and keep ibuprofen with me. problem solved! (and I actually get horrible cramps, but I don't shut down my life because of them, and I don't need an app to do it for me!)
xNephilim 19
Those apps do much more than just tracking your period. They calculate how long it will last and depending on which one you get, they may also give you a lot of helpful tips to be more comfortable. Also, most people don't have a calendar anymore, especially teenagers. Our calendars are in our phones or iPods.
sleepereffect 0
shhh the bible belt
cynthiaF 0
It's probably the way you answered...
SteelCladAngel 0
I had heavy periods and cramps so bad I'd throw up and throw up so much I'd dehydrate myself and needed to go to the ER twice due to dehydration from bleeding and vomiting had tons of Drs appointments and well...I have no cysts or anything else wrong with me after having kids though...no cramps! *dance* lol