Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML
Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I started fixing my hair and unbuttoning a couple of buttons on my shirt, hoping the policeman would let me off with a warning. When he got to the car, he rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. I saw him walk back to the cop car gagging. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML
Today, at a red light, an old lady crossing the street fell right in front of my car. I got out of my car to help her. The light turned green and I was still helping the woman to her feet. An officer came by and ticketed me for "impeding the flow of traffic." FML
Today, while working as a highway patrol officer, I pulled over my girlfriend for speeding and was required by law to ticket her. Another officer was with me, so I couldn't not ticket her without being reported. We share a joint account, so I basically ticketed myself. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Did she still get out of the ticket? I think we are all wondering that.
sunny013 8
Be careful what you wish for OP. You just might get it…
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Comments (91)
rainbowsheepfarm 2
Incorrect use of a semicolon. It should be a colon.
jeniaisling 6
Be happy it wasn't her trying to reveal her thong.
icyyicee 1
Hey! Hey! You! Come here! Here's a donut for you.
BrendaC_fml 4
Why would an old lady be speeding?
Taurus_ChicKa 37
So, you're saying if she'd been a hot Barbie-doll type, you wouldn't have given her a ticket? Based solely on her looks? Yeah, this is what you call a crooked/dirty cop. I'm glad I don't live in California at this rate...seriously, wtf?
SneezyBear 27
No, he didn't say anything of the sort. He just said he had a fantasy of seeing an attractive pair of boobs. Nowhere did he say he would actually do the illegal thing and let an attractive woman off for actually revealing some. Like others have said, for all we know he might actually want a woman to do that just so he can still give them a ticket. Stop assuming things.
SpriteAndBananas 14
Perv... you deserved it.
Arlisshsr 9
You are what is wrong with the world.
Cadillac_kid_15 27
Why do cops have to suck like that? It's only speeding. What's the big deal? Unless you're driving recklessly, then high speeds are fine, especially on the interstate. But 70, really? That's ridiculous.
daemonsparta 16
if you're a cop so would let a woman off that way then ydi. karmas a bitch
lucasj23 11
you sound like a real asshole. ydi. and I don't think you should be a cop.