Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML
Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I started fixing my hair and unbuttoning a couple of buttons on my shirt, hoping the policeman would let me off with a warning. When he got to the car, he rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. I saw him walk back to the cop car gagging. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML
Today, at a red light, an old lady crossing the street fell right in front of my car. I got out of my car to help her. The light turned green and I was still helping the woman to her feet. An officer came by and ticketed me for "impeding the flow of traffic." FML
Today, while working as a highway patrol officer, I pulled over my girlfriend for speeding and was required by law to ticket her. Another officer was with me, so I couldn't not ticket her without being reported. We share a joint account, so I basically ticketed myself. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Did she still get out of the ticket? I think we are all wondering that.
sunny013 8
Be careful what you wish for OP. You just might get it…
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Comments (91)
uhnevermind 24
It's obvious that I'm in the minority of commenters here, but when I ran this scenario through my head, I imagined him wanting to have a women do this specifically so he could still give her a ticket. A lot of people seem to forget not all cops are crooked, and immediately assume the worst. He could have easily just wanted a story to tell, or to test his judgement. He wasn't necessarily a pervert.
jude_iscariot 7
You deserve it for being a disgusting pig who has been looking forward to this.
SneezyBear 27
#119 sorry let me see if I get this straight... he's a disgusting pig for... liking the idea of seeing a bit of boobage? So he's a disgusting pig for being heterosexual then?
jude_iscariot 7
He is a disgusting pig for "waiting his entire career" to see some woman flaunt her boobs at him in an attempt to get out of a ticket. It also makes him a bad police officer.
SneezyBear 27
If I was a guy, I'd admit to finding the idea of seeing a lady flash her boobs to try and get out of a ticket very sexually attractive, and yes, deep down I might even look forward to the possibility of that ever happening. It's human nature to appreciate attractive members of the opposite sex. As long as he doesn't try to manipulate anyone into doing it, he's not doing anything wrong and it sure as hell isn't going to interfere with his job. Fantasy =/= reality.
jude_iscariot 7
You and he need to get laid if you sit around looking forward to a woman flashing her **** at you. It's just creepy. You need a more rewarding sex life.
CaptainBlack 18
YDI for thinking it's acceptable to give someone a speeding ticket
skyeyez9 25
Granny: is there a problem officer? (Flashes saggy cleavage). (.)(.) Cop: O.o
harmtouch16 11
So you admit you're a pig...with an extra side of bacon?
RedPillSucks 33
Dude. The cops life is not for you. Switch to gynecology. I'm sure there's more pussy perks on that job. Trust me. I've played a doctor on TV.
jhs578650 9
If I were a police officer, flirting to get out of a ticket would result in an automatic ticket, even if I would have otherwise written a warning. I recognize it as a manipulation tactic, and manipulation attempts are just insulting.
pixiemay 5
Well you deserved it. Simply for looking forward to an opportunity to perv while on duty. This is why people don't respect the police, they don't act like professionals.
notsofriendly 17
So much for the "perks" of the job...
skyeyez9 25
My australian cattle dog saved me from a speeding ticket one time. As I was being lectured about the dangers of going 15mph over, my perpetually cheerful, overly friendly cattle dog licked the officer inside his mouth while he was in mid sentence. The cop made all kinds of over dramatic spitting and gagging motions, then left.