Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML
Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I started fixing my hair and unbuttoning a couple of buttons on my shirt, hoping the policeman would let me off with a warning. When he got to the car, he rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. I saw him walk back to the cop car gagging. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML
Today, at a red light, an old lady crossing the street fell right in front of my car. I got out of my car to help her. The light turned green and I was still helping the woman to her feet. An officer came by and ticketed me for "impeding the flow of traffic." FML
Today, while working as a highway patrol officer, I pulled over my girlfriend for speeding and was required by law to ticket her. Another officer was with me, so I couldn't not ticket her without being reported. We share a joint account, so I basically ticketed myself. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Did she still get out of the ticket? I think we are all wondering that.
sunny013 8
Be careful what you wish for OP. You just might get it…
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Comments (91)
KeeLady 20
That's what you get for being a pervy police officer!
Beepbeep7 14
I'm pretty sure it wasn't like that.All the officers I know get a kick out of the women that try to use their assets to get out of tickets.
Mitchman7 8
why were you looking at a elderly lady's breasts?
kelseythompson 27
She squished them against the window!? Maybe...
skitzymew 19
Haven't you heard of woman trying to get out of tickets by being flirty? I'm sure OP didn't have much of a choice...
Kateyez_26 13
Cop = pig
desidog 12
Ydi for being a prev
DocBastard 40
This makes me wonder if any gynaecologists go into that field for similar reasons. If so, they're in for an even scarier reality check.
ninjuh_wingman 29
Read the FML again and then see why what you wrote was wrong.
Grand_Cookie 21
Haha! Whoops! There's always tomorrow though!
Welshite 40
Yes, well maybe your password shouldn't be "welshiteishawt". Your password should be a bit more complex, and not be so accurate.
speakersboom 19
she probably got a second ticket for flat tires, too...
polluxdc 10
Take my like
speakersboom 19
your like is taken....?
perdix 31
Tell her that her display makes you inclined to let her off, but hold out for the Gummi *******. It'll be so worth it!! Or so I've heard.
mxij 13
Now now Perdix, let's not get into your hobbies.
Ugi 27
Perdix - you need help! (but that is comment-of-the-day for me so far!)
RedPillSucks 33
I'm sure there are many gummi grandmas willing to help perdix out. Frankly, I'm sure his hands are tired.