Today, I proposed to a girl I'd been in love with for 6 years. I filled the balcony of the building where I'd first laid eyes on her with innumerable roses and, under the starlit sky, I did it. She later posted on facebook 'OMG. This geek I knew from high school did the FUNNIEST thing today'. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in front of about 75 people in the fanciest restaurant in town. She told me she was already engaged, while holding up her right hand. FML
Today, I proposed to the girl of my dreams. She asked me who I was, and maced me. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I got reservations for a romantic dinner, and at the end, fireworks would spell out my proposal. The whole thing had taken weeks to plan out and had cost me a lot of money. She proposed to me at a subway station first. FML
Today, I finally plucked up the courage to propose to my girlfriend of 7 months. I took her out to the park where we had our first kiss, I got down on one knee, and before I could say, "Will you marry me?" a bird shat on my head. FML
Today, I married the beautiful girl I’ve been in love with since we were both 6 years old. By married, I mean I performed the marriage ceremony as the vicar and watched her smile and kiss her arsehole boyfriend, now husband, right in front of me. FML
Today, after pouring my heart out to my girlfriend of four years through a speech that took me three weeks to write, and then proposing, she responded, "Eh, why not." FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML
Today, I decided to confess my feelings and perform a love song I'd written for my crush during an open mic night. He was there - he also took the opportunity to declare his love to his on-off girlfriend, get down on one knee and propose to her. She said yes. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend, whom I'm madly in love with, by having a plane fly over her house spelling "Marry me Abby?" After seeing it, she locked herself in her room and cried for hours, exclaiming that this wasn't how she wanted to be proposed to. I'd invited my entire family. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML
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Top comments
netfreak 0
I'm confused. Were you two at least going out?
fractal47 2
Were you two dating at all? Or did you just decide to propose out of nowhere with no prior relationship history?
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Comments (252)
Muninn 0
You're some geek from high school? Was she even *aware* that you'd "laid eyes on her" on that balcony before? Jesus Christ on toasted rye, that's freaking creepy. How did you ever become old enough to propose to someone? I'd've put my money on you choking to death on paint chips, like, long ago.
CaptainPat 0
Well why would you propose to a girl thats not your girlfriend? My bet is your like that overly weird kid you only see on TV sitcoms, and in extreme cases once in a while in elementary school that, had the lazy eye, and the always runny nose that you wiped on your grandma-knit sweater, peed his pants, ate glue and boogers, chased girls on the playground and gave them creepy little valentines from your slobbery boogery hands, that had crude stick figure pictures of them and you drawn on them in crayon, with her name spelled wrong with backwards letters, and were like "will you be my girlfriend now?" And when she said no you probably threw a worm at her or something. Then you grew up, and continued your obsession and proposed to her without ever asking her out even? is that what happened? I bet it is. And now i bet your returning to your bowl of Cheetos, and that cherry Slurpee, in your moms basement surrounded by countless empty pepsi bottles, and dirtied tube socks, in front of your computer playing WOW, with posters of weird girls in anime costumes you met at comic cons on the wall, until your mom comes down and tells you your PB and J is done and catches you getting friendly with one of said socks. So you pull up your sweat pants, and brush the Cheeto crumbs off your Nuarto t-shirt, go eat with your mom, and get out of the hose maybe.
dg72592_fml 0
this was both the cruelest and the funniest thing i have ever read.
Baroness542 6
Ohh man, that made me laugh. But you forgot about his thick-rimmed glasses that are always tilted to one side. :P
RighteousDiego 0
Ha!! Favorited just for that long-and-funny reply.
RhymePrime 7
No that's your life, Lol. Why all the self loathing sir?
itsallrelative 0
Dear Anon98WithCake, Please don't ever call anyone stupid again. your = possession. example: Your cat is orange. you're = contraction of the words you and are. example: You're clearly not in a position to pity anyone. Dear thelonelylurker, I believe your name says it all. Not that this man made a good life decision, but really, your (Anon98, note the correct usage) name suggests that you behave in much the same way. Dear JackOLantern, Way to give it the good college try. In the future, try asking her out for coffee first.
signe_fml 0
You proposed to someone without having been in a relationship with them first? Totally a YDI moment.
DJ375 0
stalker!!! god bro you gotta date a girl before you ask for hand in marrige
bethechange_fml 0
Im sorry. I bet it hurt But you gotta propose to someone you are already dating.
natividales 0
what the **** were you thinking??? that some girl would marry you before dating?? that's just plain stupid. sorry if you got hurt but it's creepy... learn from that.. first you date, then you propose... god..
equastriangirl 0
werent you dating her? if not why would you ever think she would say yes and if you were dating then im sure she wasnt talking about you :)
turdburgers 0
She sounds like a dumb bimbo, and from her status I get the feeling you know nothing about her except what you make up in daydreams.
NightJack 0
and this is why we don't propose marriage to people we hardly know. If you actually did this... you ARE a geek who has no understanding of how relationships work. You don't just ask some girl to marry you out of the blue! Even couples who have been together for a long time discuss marriage before someone goes and proposes.