Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're driving home, a butterfly lands on the windshield. Just as my daughter comments on how pretty the butterfly is, I turned a corner and accidentally hit the windshield wipers and smeared the pretty butterfly across the windshield. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while driving with my three year-old, I was showing her the different kinds of birds. I pointed out a bright red cardinal perched in a row of hedges. She squealed as it took flight, so happy to see such a brightly colored birdie fly. Until it hit my windshield. FML
Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML
Today, while driving home, I looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that my three-year-old daughter had managed to get out of her seat and had crawled to the back window. I pulled over and strapped her in again. Five minutes later she was back at the window. FML
Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML
Today, I picked up my daughter from daycare. As we were getting into the car, I strapped her into the car seat, but something felt off. I looked back and realized I had picked up the wrong kid. In my defense, she was wearing the same jacket as my daughter. FML
Today, I was really excited that I'd made it the two weeks I'd borrowed my mother-in-law's new car without putting a scratch on it. I got off work to discover a customer's child throwing rocks in the parking lot. They cracked the windshield. FML
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Top comments
anglcdvl89 0
I can just hear a little girl go "Look how pretty the butterfly i--WHATDIDYOUDOOOOO???" FbothyourL because now your daughter probably thinks your a monster.
xkonstantine125x 7
Lol...I'm still laughing..oh god this is great
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Comments (128)
Silent_Harmony 3
#5 - you obviously don't have a kid or else you'd understand
saailaway 0
hahahahah i can picture that. thats hilarious lmfao
snavula 0
#5 and # 21 appear to be the only ones that think this isn't an fml. This is the epitome of FML and I think its great! Obviously, little kids love butterflies and at those young ages they don't understand the concept of an accident nor death really and so this can be contrived as a horrible act to a child. Really isn't that hard to figure out.
FacePALM24 0
How does a butterfly land on a moving car?
Sokai_fml 0
I LOL'd.
xKattAttack 0
I agree with #66. It would've splattered on impact if the car was in motion. And who the heck accidentally hits their windshield wipers? I call bullshit.
Somebody52 0
OMFG I CAN NOT STOP LAUGHING!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
AnotherStranger2 0
... ._.; Ooooh.... beauty is a fragile thing... I hope she isn't too hurt by it. :( Poor butterfly... poor kid. Well, you can explain death to her... and that the last thing ever thought about the butterfly was how pretty it was, so it lived a good life. So she can make sure the last thing anyone thinks about her is something good? ...Still, fyl... and fHerlife, and fTheButterfly'slife. HOW IS THIS FUNNY?! To little kids, this is considered execution-worthy! Sad.
crazieeli 0
oh, thats disgusting! yuck. haha
I_am_stupid_also 6
#68 - Looks like this happened while they were still in the driveway of the day care, so they haven't picked up enough speed to pulverize it on contact. And it said she hit the wiper instead of the turn signal. It happens, especially if you are distracted. I don't think young kids are bothered by death unless it is someone they are close too. The butterfly is just gone. I think they would be more bothered that the windshield isn't clean anymore.