Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
ASMR
Today, I listened to a recording of a woman saying, "I love you" for about 30 mins straight. That's apparently the only way I can feel loved. FML
It's the thought that counts…
Today, I finally had a man say, "I love you" to me in a sincere tone. It was a customer, who was high, over the phone. I said it back. FML
Falling
Today, I treated myself to an hour long massage. Halfway through, I mumbled, “Thank you” to the masseuse and, without thinking, added, “I love you.” There was a long pause. Then she patted my head and whispered, “You’re welcome.” FML
So, are you in or are you out?
Today, I told my long time crush, "I love you," in an elaborate way. She replied, "What an interesting perspective." FML
Cheesy
Today, I told my best friend that there was a time that I loved her, then told her it was today, yesterday, last week, last month, last year, and listed several years before that, etc. Her response? "Wow, I can't believe we've known each other that long." FML
Today, I realized that when my boyfriend said, "I'll love you forever" what he really meant was, "I'll love you until I meet your significantly more attractive sister." FML
Forget it
Today, I was on the phone with my best guy friend, who I have loved for years. I was talking about school and all of a sudden he said, "I love you." I flipped out saying, "Oh my god, oh my god. I love you too!" He responded with, "What?" He was talking to his mom, who was walking out the door. FML
Today, I told my mom, "I love you". She responded with, "What? I never told you I loved you." FML
Today, I was texting a girl that I've liked for some time. When I asked her what she was doing, she replied "texting and p.s. I love you". I replied by telling her my feelings for her. Turns out "p.s. I love you" was the name of the movie she was watching with her friends. FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Bye, love you," to a co-worker as I clocked out. Before I made it home, I had six missed calls and a long text from my co-worker professing her love to me. FML
Top comments
Diarrhea_Volcano 29
All that matters is that you love them long time.
Bonngoo 34
"If you believe in yourself you can achieve anything" - Johnny Karate
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Comments (48)
CrassKal 27
What the mother ****?
CrassKal 27
Damn, I knew I should've put quotation marks around it. Oh well.
dutchy86 20
lack of education if you never seen the movie.
Publikwerks 14
My wife had that engraved in my wedding ring... God I love her
Publikwerks 14
Profile pic is the proof
chicagossirish 7
Bullshit I bet you could suck a golf ball though a garden hose
Publikwerks 14
But it ain't too goddamned beaucoup.
brucee1119 8
You poor dumbass.
capnjacksparrow 7
I too use words I don't understand to make me seem more photosynthesis
amsterdamgirl 20
ydi love you long time! (hahaha)
mdavis0529 14
What is your major malfunction?!?!?
JosephKorso 15
Maybe don't say phrases that you don't know the meaning of? I mean, Basic Stuff to Know 101.
SaintGoobers 19
"What can I get for Three dollars?" Anything you want ;) Love that movie.