Today, I hooked up with a girl from the bar. We went back to my place and started making out, I took off her shirt and bra and started kissing her breasts. I felt her chest hair tickle my tongue. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met a girl at a bar, we had a few drinks and really hit it off. We headed back to my place to get a little action. As she was riding me, she got rougher and rougher until she reached down and yanked a patch of hair right out of my beard. I yelped in pain and didn’t even finish. FML
Today, after months of Tinder-ing, first dates and being rejected, I finally was able to hook up with a girl. We met, we kissed, we danced and I took her back to my place. She then promptly tried to make out with my roommate. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone" in a seductive tone. FML
Today, I was going to hook up with a new girl. She told me not to shower or wear deodorant when I came over, which I thought was a little odd but went along with. As we were getting warmed up, she started licking my sweaty armpit and moaning loudly. This is probably too weird to tolerate. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
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Top comments
kellster 2
Either she was a tranny, or you're really exaggerating. You do know that people have body hair, right? As in, the tiny, fuzzy kind? You'd probably better get over that pretty soon or you'll never have sex again.
icanhazlizard 0
I agree with 3 and 6. Hair is a natural part of being human. The girls are already expected to shave way more of their bodies than men have to be socially acceptable. I'm sick of hearing about how the hair on girls is disgusting. We shouldn't be rejected or made to go through ridiculously elaborate and time-consuming grooming routines because of it. It's *natural*. Get the **** over it.
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Comments (325)
Dalarsco 0
#10: Tell me this, do you like a man with a full beard and hair everywhere? Because if I met a girl who wanted me 100% shaved I would probably do it. And yes, women have more surface area that is expected to be hairless by most people. But it only has to be shaved when she expects to be with bear legs. A man is socially expected in most places to have a clean-shaven face. We can't just wear something that covers it if we're feeling lazy, or if we **** up and get a cut.
Glitchman_fml 0
Not seeing why so many feminists are going on their rage mode today. I got nothing against hair, but if there's just one long atrocious nipple hair sticking out (believe me, I've seen it before), you better trim that because it is disgusting, and I'm a guy who doesn't even mind (within reason) pubic hair.
RavishMe77 0
Agreed with #10 and #17. I like to get rid of what body hair I can, to a certain degree (legs, underarms, bikini area, the norms). We can't be expected to shave/wax our entire goddamn bodies, and demanding that we do so is pretty freaking ridiculous. I hate the fact that, in general, women are expected to spend a lot more time primping themselves than men are.
whyowhy26 3
ok whats 69?? tell me sum1.
love2shop 0
ahhhh thats bad very bad haha
were_giraffe 2
um... that's not uncommon actually
shoegal808 0
A girl who has hair on her body - OH MY GOD :| I could understand it being gross if they were like huge, long, curly, coarse, man hairs! but a little bit of hair is really not a big deal. it pisses me off when guys complain about stuff like this. Shit, if girls complained about the hair on guys' bodies, we would never shut up!
BryonyRogers 0
This guy sounds like Charlie with a bad encounter from Two and a half men!
dankadank 0
dude # 27..seriously??? PRUUUUUUUDE/VIRGIN. i reaaaalllly hope you are like 11 or something cuz if your not thats sad
rofl_lord 1
well done #10! gotta luv a chick wiv a mind ov her own! go girl ;p