Today, I held a door open for my boyfriend and jokingly said, "Chivalry is dead?" He responded with, "Who's chivalry?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I learned that chivalry truly is dead when a seemingly fit man pushed me into a door to get a seat on the train before me. My leg is in a cast. FML
Today, I was told off for not holding the door open for a woman behind me at work. Yesterday I was informed that chivalry is offensive to women, as it implies that they are not equal to men. I can't win. FML
Today, I held the door open for someone and he said, "Thank you!" I said, "Thank you!" back. FML
Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML
Today, I brought up the subject of marriage with my boyfriend. His response was to shoot me with a nerf gun and laugh. FML
Today, my boyfriend opened the car door in a very kind and loving way. What wasn't so kind and loving was that my hand was still half-way when he closed it. FML
Today, I proposed to my boyfriend. He laughed at me and said that proposing is a man's job, not a woman's. FML
Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML
Today, I saw my boyfriend coming up the walkway to our home. When I opened the door to greet him with a huge smile on my face, he scowled at me and angrily said, "I don't know why you have to do that!" Smile gone. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me for not closing the door when I pooped. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
I just can't help but feed this through my Idiot-English Translation Engine: "Haha! That's actually pretty funny! If he doesn't know what chivalry is then it really MUST be dead! Haha! **** your life for having a dumb boyfriend! I failed third grade, but thank god the Internet doesn't discriminate based on age, race, and IQ!" Much better.
Bathory_fml 0
If we hold the door open for you, we're being misogynist because we apparently think you can't open the door yourself. If we let you open the door yourself, we're not being chivalrous enough for you. :| I'm so happy I'm gay.
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Comments (269)
FreebirdIII 1
I blame women suffrage.
tk1235 0
wow he must be a pretty bright guy
kay729 7
if you don't know what chivalry is you are dumb as hell p.s it's not a person that's the whole point of the fml
skitzofreniks 5
thanks, tips.
Got_any_grapes1 4
I honestly do not know what that means as I am originally from russia... Anyone? Hehe
SmelloJello 9
you got yourself a good one there...
yuggi1 11
Now he's going to think you are cheating on him with "Chivalry". Or something like that.
harlan71 0
ydi for having such a dumb ass bf
chuchurocket 4
chivalry is my bro D:
kai22 1
don't say it's dead some of us guys are just tools because chivalry is still alive with me
smellymellyy 7
freedom of speech? WTF. so basically youre all saying that its perfectly alright to say whatever we want to people whether it hurts their feelings or not..? thats ****** up. and you docbastard have your head up your bloody ass and are really immature. whether your an adult with a family doesnt matter, ive seen 5 year olds tell jokes better than that retarded swordfish thing. and seriously, yes people care about grammar, but not on the internet on humour sites like fml.so docbastard even if their grammar annoys you, no need to single them out and bully them from behind a computer screen like a desperate coward trying to seem cool and funny on the internet to a bunch of kids by hurting someones feelings who you dont even know. other peoples grammar doesntmatter to you so leave them alone. its just low