Today, I heard my roommate moaning my name in the shower. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
MY EARS! MY EARS!
Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML
Today, I woke up from a nap to hear my roommate having some intimate time with his hand. The slopping and slurping sounds along with the girly man squeal as he finished haunted me all day. FML
Right place, wrong person
Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close the door as I've seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML
Right place, wrong body
Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close it because I'd seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML
The sound of silence
Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML
In the mood
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
Frustrated
Today, I listened to my roommate having sex from 3 a.m. until 6 a.m. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
Heaven knows I'm miserable now
Today, I was singing my heart out in the shower, convinced I was alone. Turns out my roommate had friends over, and they could hear everything through the bathroom vent. Now, they keep requesting encore performances of my renditions of songs by The Smiths. FML
Top comments
Tylerj1124 12
Maybe they fell and hit their head and are trying to get you to call help?
Pleonasm 36
Maybe he/she was just singing in the shower and it was a coincidence, like : "Hey Mickey you so fine, you so fine you blow my mind! OooOOooo MICKEY! YES, MICKEY! YES! MIIIIIiiickey..." That's totally how it goes.
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Comments (127)
inolongercare 19
Your opposite sex roommate?
merrilln 7
Explain why this is bad?
Kauphy 12
Considering OP posted it here, he/she clearly does not hold any romantic feelings for the roommate. Unwanted affection is rarely a good thing.
karen1991 15
You might want to replace whatever u had in the shower that they may or may have not used and thought of u...eww
VulpesImortalis 4
could be good provided they are a chick n u are a dude.
Kauphy 12
You do realize that OP could be gay?
Aregonde 15
Maybe he was cursing you for using his shampoo or shedding pubes everywhere.
Fedezzer 20
Stiiiill better a love story than Twilight.
sonnyrosa 32
My room mate does that... Although, it's because he's married to me. :) sorry op... Room mate horror stories have been worse...
aeonsoul 12
Probably pranking you. Or not..
21BOSs 5
Pranking you now... Spanking you later... Watch out
kidsgotastinky 11
Hop on that
yellohgawd 3
feel flatter u must be hotttt