Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, since my finals are starting tomorrow, I made a joke about setting my math books on fire. I laughed. Friends laughed. Parents laughed. Guess what subject just managed to actually get in touch with my scented candles? FML
Today, we had a surprise test at school. I was totally unprepared for any of it, so I BSd the whole thing and turned it in. A few minutes later, our teacher said we were allowed to use our notes to finish the test. FML
Today, the final for a class I'm in is taught by a decrepit old man who apparently has a flunk-out reputation. He spent the entire previous class making a study guide for the final exam, emphasizing, "THIS is on the exam. Know THIS." I studied it hard. Absolutely none of it was on the exam. Everyone failed. FML
Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML
Today, I was in my psychology class taking the hardest test ever. After I spent most of the period trying to fill in the few answers that I knew, I looked up to see everyone with their notebooks on their desks. It was an open-note test. FML
Today, a student set me on fire while I was lecturing my class about proper lab safety. FML
Today, I found out that my entire class, me included, has to rewrite the painfully difficult midterm we wrote last week. All this because the Professor left the exams strewn across her desk. The cleaners thought it was trash and disposed of them. FML
Today, I took a major test, worth half my grade, not realizing that there were questions on the back of the sheet. FML
Today, during science, my friend thought it would be funny to pour corrosive acids into the reaction test I was making. I had to explain to my parents why I have no eyebrows, but the worst part is that I only got a D. FML
Today, I had to sit through chemistry class watching the kid in front of me slowly peel off the scabs on his arms, examine them, and then eat them. For an hour. FML
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Top comments
hiitisbrooke 28
Go grab your textbook and study s'more.
heart_aussie_fml 20
On the bright side : you now know how to make gummy bears explode
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Comments (98)
hiitisbrooke 28
Go grab your textbook and study s'more.
CheeseHater 23
How come there are 2 versions of the #1 comment?
Pleonasm 36
She edited her comment, and the FMLs under the top spot take about 30+ minutes to renew who is top, and what changes happened to the comment. Hence the difference between the two comments.
gun6slinger9 9
I would assume you're in post secondary education. A large majority of profs don't teach and all profs don't teach you everything you need to know. They don't spoon feed you your education anymore. Maybe after this midterm you will read your textbook throughout the semester for your final.
ROSI3TH3CAT 18
Thats brilliant :3
lilmisslovely13 15
Time to bear down and teach yourself
Karalela44 15
Punny
airforce987 20
Beary punny
abrookec2011 14
Just bearly study, though. Wouldn't want to extinguish yourself.
jeffree_adams 5
Ba dum ts.
Arrawyn 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well that's not your problem... It's theirs. Can someone say fired?
joshiepo0 18
He's probably in college which usually means most of the learning comes from studying.
kittykat1497 7
F-iii-errrrr-d! Ha! Yes, I can. :)
lhazz11 23
^reminded me of the boss from the Cat in the Hat movie:3
benhd1 14
Not with tenure.
Codezlol 21
16- College or not, if the professor/teacher isn't laying information out to the students to prepare them for midterms, then said teacher will be removed from their job, plain and simple. And just me, but I doubt they're in post secondary using Bunsen burners and making s'mores, lol.
nigsuzzi 3
Teachers can't be fires. On the other hand cooking with Bunsen burners is extremely bad. There's all sorts of chemical residues on them many of which are carcinogenic.
farewellthebeast 8
Class time and demonstrations are only half the learning process rest comes from reading your book and studying however maybe the mid term will be over how to make a prefect smore in which case strive for that A+.
Pyapi 20
What is the perfect marshmallow to chocolate to cookie ratio? Ah, I never could get that one right!
cswens25 8
Something tells me there was probably more of a relationship between these demonstrations and kinetics than OP thinks.
heart_aussie_fml 20
On the bright side : you now know how to make gummy bears explode
TurquoiseJesus 15
And frankly, which is gonna help you more, silly kinetics, or awesome explosions?
codyjohn17 5
36- Awesome explosions WITH GUMMY BEARS!!!!
Qwermy 16
One of my teachers was exactly like this, except he set off the fire alarm when he blew up the gummy bears.
Futacy 30
Sorry buddy, at least you've still got those textbooks from the school system to study from. And (if you can) you might want to talk to other teachers/professors at your school/college and ask if they can help you review. That always helps me whenever I have shitty teachers.
BGAL7090 6
I want to learn how to blow up a gummy bear!
rattusrattus 19
Step one: Gummy bear Step two: C-4 Step three: Detonator Step four: ???? Step five: EXPLOSION!
llamafish 25
Try potassium perchlorate! So much fun! (not for the gummy bear though)
Riya2595 15
Is kinetics physics or chemistry?
Pleonasm 36
Physics. It pertains to motion and its causes. So forces, basically, which usually falls under physics, but also intersects somewhat with chemistry, as things do. So why they are burning s'mores is beyond me. Sounds more like something a mad chemistry teacher does, along with exploding gummy bears
Sirin_fml 47
Chemical kinetics is a branch of chemistry.
perdix 31
#7. It's both. Sometimes, it's part of physical chemistry -- the intersection of physics with chemistry. Let's see. With the s'mores, you have phase changes, denaturating proteins, caramelizing sugar and Maillard reactions. With the gummy bears, it probably involves using the heat to generate CO2 gas in a way that confines the gas until the pressure builds up and it explodes. Those could both be fine experiments if explained in a scientific way.
whostolemylama 12
I could have sworn it was physics. I remember learning Kinetic Energy transfers to Potential Energy throu..I shall spare the science lingo. I suppose *The more you know*
Rancor 5
I seriously doubt that he only taught you that, he obviously taught you how to cook mini hotdogs and hot chocolate. Pfft ungrateful people nowadays.
Icestorm875 9
OP, is there a textbook? If you haven't been reading the textbook then ydi, but fyl if there is no textbook. Best of luck to you! No matter what, I absolutely hate possibly failing a test.
perdix 31
At least you know how to eat well while you are camping, and with the quality of education you are receiving, I see some involuntary camping in your future.