Today, I had to take a drug test for my new job, which I desperately need and which took me over a year to land. I got a shy bladder and couldn't pee. They marked me as non-compliant and revoked the job offer. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Pissed
Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of piss all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML
Waste of time
Today, the lab wouldn't let me do my pre-employment drug test because they had no time when I had to pee really bad. They signed me in to do other blood work I needed, but when I asked to use the bathroom, they said it was for drug testing only. I peed myself in the lobby and couldn't do the blood test either. FML
Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML
Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML
Today, I took a drug test. Not only did I fail the drug test, but I mostly missed the sample cup and got urine all over my pants. FML
Taking the piss
Today, my mom forced me to take a drug test while she watched. I couldn’t do it due to nerves, so she grounded me because, "there's no way I would be nervous unless I was doing drugs." Nope, just a shy bladder. FML
Today, I had to resign from my job because I tested positive for drugs. I've never taken drugs. FML
Today, I paid for someone else's piss so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML
Are you taking the piss?
Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML
Today, I had to be an observer for a drug test at work. Me and two others got to watch 130 guys take a piss, and then leave work two hours later than everyone else. FML
Top comments
Tripartita 45
That is no laughing matter, OP! Discrimination based age, race, gender, or disability—including shy bladder—is not funny. If you or a loved one are on the receiving end of shy bladder discrimination, call our hotline at 1-800-PIS-DOFF and know that you are NOT alone!
Enkeria 30
That's awful OP! Having a shy bladder is common. I have a shy bladder. Try and see if you can apply for the job again and then drink plenty of water before the test, but not too much so you don't ruin the test. I did that for my current job and it helped a lot. Hope this helps! :)
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Comments (23)
TheNewGuy03 29
It's safe to say that your bladder just pissed away your opportunity at this job.
chewsef 17
I'd be .....pissed.
atomicxsarah 17
That sucks. You should have sat there all day and drank water until you could pee bad enough. I also have a shy bladder and I sat somewhere once for 3 hours until I could make myself pee to get a job.
dontknow1 19
I didn't know that could happen, I hope you get another chance, if not, try to get another job.
Zeenaboo 4
Being prune juice
Tripartita 45
would suck. You'd be doomed end up in somebody's stomach.
kristi42791 4
As someone who does drug screens as part of my job, there is either more to the story or the person who did you test does not know the rules. If you are unable to go right away, you should have three hours from then to give a sample. It usually doesn't take everyone three hours to go, but you do have that much time. If you went over the three hour mark without giving a sample then yes, they end the test and your employer doesn't HAVE to give you another chance to test.
OMGITSTANA 15
TALK TO THEM TRY AN EXPLAN U SHOULD BE ABLE TO TAKE AGAIN
momac86 17
Ah ha ha shy bladder sry that sucks tho
icecreamisrad 13
Why didn’t you drink so much water you’d have to pee no matter what? Hmm