Today, I had planned to break up with my overbearing girlfriend. She went into complete denial mode, bought me a pair of oversized sunglasses and tomorrow we're going ice-skating. Kill me now. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided that the best place to break up with me was during a movie about two couples breaking up. FML
Today, I actually thought of faking my own death to get away from my girlfriend and her insane, overbearing family. FML
Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML
Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML
Today, right before a huge snowstorm hit our area, I broke up with my girlfriend. In her fury, she decided to grab my car keys and roll down all four windows in my car. I now have 2 feet of half melted snow in my backseat. FML
Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with depression. My girlfriend's idea of consoling me was to break up with me because she can't date a "psycho". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
minna97 14
BUT SHE WAS GOING TO HAVE YOUR CHILDREN
thrifting 18
Maybe the sunglasses are in the black eye, she's going to give you the next time you try to break up with her.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (139)
DevilsAltair 8
OK OP,LISTEN HERE AND LISTEN CLOSELY!GET A FRIEND TO COME WITH YOU AND SAY,BITCH GET OUT OF MY LIFE!IF SHES IN DENIAL HAVE YOUR FRIEND HOLD HER BACK WHILE U MAKE A QUICK GETAWAY,AND IF ITS YOUR HOUSE BE PREPARED AND PACK EVERYTHING THAT U NEED BUT NOT EVERYTHING BECAUSE SHE MIGHT NOT BE IN DRNIAL!yw
awkocheerleader 5
If you want out just stright up say it because she might not have understood what you were trying to say and its not fair for either of you if you want a break up and she is acting all lovey dovey. Remember that at one point you liked her lot thats why you dated so just beware of her feelings two.
zomgwtfbbq 3
RUN. You should never see her again. You deserve to be with someone who actually likes you and respects you. This woman does not. You deserve better than someone who is abusive.
Sophie_Hart 9
she probably poked holes in your condoms...
Vaati_fml 20
I think a restraining order would be best.
mermaidgirl5413 10
Lock her in a box and run
Dynamite73 25
Run. Don't even tell her you're leaving. Take the essentials and get the hell out of there. Fake your death. Run.
DigitalCat 4
Sounds like she'll take care of that tomorrow.