Today, I had a ride along in an ambulance. Being observant, I thought it was funny that a patient had to vomit. That was until I realized they couldn't control where they had to vomit. I spent the rest of the ambulance ride holding a vomit bag in front of the woman's face. Not so funny anymore. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML
Today, we had a patient projectile vomiting in our ambulance. I didn't know she had puked on our cot until I found it with my bare hand at the hospital. FML
Today, I was volunteering at the hospital. This lady was calling the Nurses' Station, and I had to go see what she wanted. When I asked her what she needed, she mumbled something. As I leaned in closer to hear what she was saying, she threw up all over my face. Apparently, she was nauseous. FML
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I was discharged from hospital and I took a cab home. The driver drove really fast and made sharp turns that made me feel nauseous. As I opened my mouth to tell him to slow down, I threw up all over the back seat. FML
Today, I drove a friend to the emergency room because he thought he had appendicitis. While sitting in the waiting room, I got puked on by a child. My friend's diagnosis? Gas. So he also farted all the way home. FML
Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML
Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML
Today, after changing and dressing my 6-month-old into his super cute brand new outfit, I saw the telltale sign of him about to vomit. Without thinking, I cup my hand under his mouth and catch it all. I had to sit there with a hand full of puke and nowhere to dump it. FML
Today, my friend made me go on a carnival ride. The whole time, I complained that I was going to puke. I didn't, though. She did, all over me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ChickenTenders 6
Not quite sure how someone needing to vomit is funny...
rsunshine2020 13
You have a SICK sense of humor
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (137)
staroftexas9 3
Oh it's just so funny that a person is so sick they need an ambulance! Lets let the patient know that we are here for them and comfort them by being amused at their ailment. Grow up! YDI and justice would be the patient projectile vomiting on your dumb butt!
chris_42 11
People like you make me want to vomit. Speaking of, could you help me out with that?
_scootie_ 4
Welcome to the ambulance service! Dealing with people throwing up is a regular occurrence, they will do it in front of you, around you, near you, and when you're particularly unlucky they'll throw up all over you! Get used to it!
Fmylab 8
You're trapped in a rolling tin can with someone about to hurl and it doesn't occur to you that you're gonna get some on you? You may not be smart enough to be a medic.
morella_xx 29
You're a moron, OP. If a person is so ill/injured that they need an ambulance, there's nothing funny there. Whatever program you're in that sent you on the ride along, I hope you don't get certified, because you do NOT belong in medicine.
GregoryStalver_fml 6
What on earth do you find funny in the misery of others ?
SApprentice 34
Wow, so you're an EMT, your job is to help save lives and provide medical care and comfort to those that are ill, and yet you take amusement out of another person's nausea and pain? Yeah, maybe it's time that you find yourself a new profession. I hear that the slaughter houses are hiring.
nic242 7
Thankfully he's not one yet, hopefully he don't pass
poccocurantes 7
He is an EMT. I his case it stands for evil misanthropic teen.
DocBastard 40
Hey, I'm observant too! Here, check out my observation: You're an immature ass.
fadingaway 17
Congratulations, you're a complete asshole.
rivaraven 35
I'm sorry, what? You think someone needing to vomit is funny? What's wrong with you?