Today, I got into a fight with my sister. Later on she brought me a bowl of tortilla chips, which I thought was her way of apologizing. I found out too late that she'd licked the flavoring off them and it was really her way of saying "Fuck you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my sister and I got into a fight. I came home to find everything in my room covered in ketchup. FML
Today, I found out that my sister licks all the flavoring off Doritos and puts them back in the bag. FML
Today, I had a fight with my little sister. Later she apologized and made me dinner to make up for it. I thought it was pretty good until I found out that instead of using Parmesan cheese in the recipe, she used foot shavings from her Ped Egg. FML
Today, my sister and I had a fight. In her rage, she threw piles of dirty laundry at me. One of her bloody panties hit me on the face. FML
Today, I finished off the last of the BBQ chips in the house. When my 6-year-old sister found out about it, she started screaming, then pulled down her pants and peed on the kitchen floor. My parents, after witnessing the whole thing, bitched me out for upsetting her. FML
Today, a fight broke out between my 21 year old sister and our 6 year old brother. I tried to intervene, only to end up getting battered to shit in the process. According to my sister, he's going to hell for eating her candy. FML
Today, my 8 year-old little sister said, "F*** you" to my mom. My mom thought I told her to say that and grounded me for a month. Later, my sister came up to me and said, "Gotcha, bitch." FML
Today, I was eating nacho chips with my nieces when I started to feel that some were wet. I look at my niece and notice she was sucking on the chips, and putting them back in the bag. FML
Today, I was woken by my younger sister punching me in the balls. She also pulled the duvet off, and dragged me out of bed by my feet and onto the floor. All because I ate her chocolates, which were a gift. I was left writhing in pain in my underwear right in front of her. FML
Today, my brother ran in, handed me a spatula, and told me to stand still. Barely a second later, our sister came tearing in the house with a fresh, raised welt on her ass cheek in the shape of said spatula, saw me holding said spatula, and kicked my ass up and down the house until I escaped. FML
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Top comments
iTzSelverZz 14
What a tasteless revenge.
foxwasalamb 24
why is nobody commenting on the amount of **** he would need for it to pass as Alfredo sauce?
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Comments (66)
kutemotoka 15
What a cruel sister... But don't worry, all sisters are like that!
quickit 24
All sisters are not in fact like that.
quickit 24
Actually, no. All sisters are not like this
orbit 22
Op's sis is just Satan.
1dvos_grl3 21
yeah.. I have 5 brothers and 3 sisters. I'm the second youngest. my siblings and I fight but we don't do that sort of thing..
illusong 16
Not all sister is as wasteful as her
imura 8
um...#19. im right here, and im deffinently not a girl.....
RecklessLove 18
Nobody said you were a girl
NobodyGay 16
You should make her some pasta. Instead of Alfredo sauce, you should **** on it.
lnheritance 19
Um. That is just messed up and uncalled for. This isn't the south where dating your cousin is okay, this is OPs sister.
flufee2 27
What the ****
Diarrhea_Volcano 29
Yummy .-.
Cass_x 22
There's something seriously wrong with you #2.
UnidentifiedFun 37
That isn't really at the same level as licking something.
foxwasalamb 24
why is nobody commenting on the amount of **** he would need for it to pass as Alfredo sauce?
flufee2 27
Cus maybe hes talented
Shadowblast423 3
really #4 Why perpetuate Southern US stereotypes when you're supposed to be the good guy here
thecman25 14
grow a pair #4
xChaos 29
Alright, calm down there satan
SystemofaBlink41 27
#21, And the amount of dedication as well!
lnheritance 19
I need to grow a pair when I find even the thought, even joking, of jizzing on food and having your sister eat it is not okay? No matter how you look at it, it is not normal and licking flavoring off chips does not deserve that.
tantanpanda 26
#56, Yea, it's pretty gross, but you didn't have to include an offensive stereotype in your opinion now did you?
NobodyGay 16
It was a ******* joke people. And **** you #4 for your stereotypical remark about the South. You can kiss my ass and eat my **** biotch.
XQuartzX 15
Siblings, always have a way to get you back. No matter what.
iTzSelverZz 14
What a tasteless revenge.
imura 8
did you really just get away with this pun? amazing. 3 thumbs up
flufee2 27
Thats just cruel..
_kyleG_ 34
Hello, satan
devildog562 33
Scorn women are more vicious then the military. Makes me question what you did. Time to start plotting vengeance.
Flaming_Pandas 15
Than*
jojimugo 20
Meh... I was expecting worse, I mean that mean but not evil
quickit 24
Kill her.
AL3XFML 7
That is nacho way of apologizing