Today, I got a text from my ex-boyfriend telling me he still likes me and might love me too. Later I asked him if he really meant it and his response was "I don't know. I was high." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML
Today, my best friend texted me and told me she broke up with her boyfriend. Trying to be supportive, I sent a long message about how he never deserved her and that I was there for her if she needed someone to vent to. She replied, "Are you high?" FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend of three and a half years a text message spilling my heart out, saying I'll love him forever, and how much I appreciate him in my life, that I want to be the mother of his children, etc. His text back to me? "Are you drunk?!?" FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend texted me, saying, "I love you." Stupidly, I was very excited and replied, "At last! I still love you", to which he replied, "wrong number sorry, I don't love you." FML
Today, I got a text from the guy I've been in love with for 3 years, saying, "So um, I've been wondering. Did you used to be a man?" FML
Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to come over. Still being in love with him, I agreed to see him but decided I wasn't drunk enough to handle the stress. After a while of drinking, he said that he really missed me and wanted to be with me. My reply consisted of throwing up. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend, with whom I'm still madly in love, called me and begged me to come back to him. In shock, I asked, "Is this some kind of joke?" He giggled, said yes, and then promptly hung up. FML
Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend got high and decided to text all our friends and family the crazy stories about us. He was even nice enough to include pictures. I hear a nude one made it to my Dad. FML
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Top comments
mrahhhhh 21
I was gonna tell this girl I hated her... but then I got high!
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
I was gonna pay my child support but then I got high....
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Comments (134)
LuxAeterna_fml 0
Can you blame him?
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
I was gonna pay my child support but then I got high....
unfortunate_13 5
don't forget to bring a towel
juicedboi 7
it's the equivalent of a drunk dial. Happens to the best of us. Your bored one night or your out, getting late, getting hornier, call a few women you might get with, if that fails, call the ex and lie out ur ass.
shovels 0
Idk, Can she?!?!
scarletdragonfly 5
29 - South Park? :)
unfortunate_13 5
97, towelie rocks :)
scarletdragonfly 5
102 - Why, yes. Yes he does. :D
DanDanGoesRawr 0
haha....legalize it.
grigz 0
maybe it was all a dream... da dad da da da da bwoooooooom
BShady96 0
hi OP's boyfriend
coltsluvr123 2
hahahaha good one
mrahhhhh 21
I was gonna tell this girl I hated her... but then I got high!
Captain_Obvious2_fml 6
because i got high, because i got high. becuase i got HHHIIIGGGHHH!!!!
EvilPotato 15
I was gonna go to school, but then I got high, then I high, then I got high.
iLazy 0
I was about to have sex Rosie O Donald because I was high.
Jesus_Christ69 0
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER !! that wasn't even a good one....
ydnar 5
I think what you meant to say was, I was gonna make a funny comment on fml but then I got high
ydnar 5
that was for #14
BrittanyCelesteP 0
you do realize 14 was quoting a song right..?
NomOnShroomz 14
That wasn't Rosie and I think we did have sex...
NomOnShroomz 14
^for 18 of course
colonel42 0
it's part of the song...
hpdc 0
I really don't see how this is an fml
doom2 8
well he's your ex for a reason.. and he was high when he said that, so...
ITIvRAPTORvITI 0
so?! you can have intimate conversations whilst high, i do it all the time! until the next day when you don't remember what you said at all. haha FML
Miss_Michaela 10
Ask him if he was high on the love.
frankgrimes 4
hilarious picture
XxCrazygirlxX 0
Shouldn't he know now, considering he was high then? =
kut19 6
ydi for dating a drug user.
HubertPL 0
9- dont knock it till you try it :) weed should be legal.
GreenMuzz 0
I tried weed and ended up being sick in hospital for two weeks. Im just messin, it was fun. The only weird thing that happened to me is that knees felt warm.
SteelCladAngel 0
yes because weed is so much worse than meth it heroine....
AnneFTW 17
40 - What a stupid argument. I'm so glad druggies won't be able to have children.
poor_gurll1198 17
Sarcasm or...?
supermagz 4
well that's just a silly lie he wasen't high he just said it cuz he was telling you the truth but was affraid you wasen't feeling the same
mbishop94479 4
Just keep telling yourself that and maybe it'll possibly be true.
kdnash91 0
that does sound like a thinking pattern of a typical male.. how degrading.
mbishop94479 4
Um......no. That's not the thinking pattern of a typical male.
pan1cked 0
well, that sucks. obviously he's your ex for a reason. looks like it's time to move on!