titkip
Nairobi, Kenya 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I got a text from a call girl. She asked me to delete her number because I'm too demanding. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
whyme
Help
Today, feeling so depressed to the point of having suicidal thoughts, I texted a girl I had a crush on. Her response? "Can you please delete my number, you're getting annoying." FML
Anonymous
United States
Spiteful
Today, I sent my mom a text to tell her about my promotion at work. She responded with, "Who is this?" It turns out that she deleted my number, because I "never call." FML
SeeBrendenBurn
United States
Today, I went to a rock concert and met this amazing girl. We started talking and then swapped cell numbers. Five minutes later, she asks to see my cellphone, so I gave it to her. Once I got home I went to text her and saw that she deleted her number. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Good one, thanks
Today, I woke up to 70 new text messages and 100 calls, all from numbers I didn't know. The night before I got into a heated argument with my old best friend about who was prettier. She got mad and posted my number on Craigslist as a prostitute. Apparently I won. FML
vegeta
Today, I’ve been getting sexy messages from an unknown number. First I told her to stop multiple times, then I blocked her. I can only assume that she changed her number and managed to find me and message me again. My girlfriend saw the messages and told me flatly “It’s over.” FML
Anonymous
United States
Not you
Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML
Anonymous
Party animal
Today, I got this beautiful girl's number at a bar. After the night was over, I was pretty drunk and sent too many drunk Snapchats. When I'd sobered up, I deleted them. She asked why I deleted them, so I said because I was drunk and didn't remember what I sent. She hasn't messaged me back since. FML
anthony
Luxembourg
Today, a cute girl I know in passing approached me very nervously and blushing like mad. She gave me a note with a number on it, said to call her, then ran away. When I called the number later, it was one of those rejection hotlines. What the hell? FML
anonymous
United States
Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML
Evan
United States
New saying just dropped
Today, my new girlfriend demanded that I delete all my female friends' numbers. Her rationale is, “When them bitches are going through some shit, a shoulder to cry on becomes a dick to ride on.” When I refused, she promptly dumped me because she doesn’t "need a potential cheater” in her life. FML
Top comments
Welshite 40
Maybe you shouldn't ask call girls to slather themselves in mayonnaise and hop on one leg while hooting like an owl.
tranced_ 45
This FML has so many issues !
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Comments (52)
misstressV 4
As an ex "call girl" it's very annoying when you have one client constantly calling and texting as if you're his girlfriend. Or if they want you to do things for them but not pay for the extra time/service. Call girls have lives too and do need down time from the work. We also charge for extra services and time as it's a job, same as a hairdresser or electrician, you pay for what you want. Respect that and this won't happen.
adamzzz 8
You are comparing something that isn't even a profession to an actual profession that takes actual skill.
jackassthebadass 11
Wouldn't you agree though that if I'm giving you money to provide a service you ought to do it with no complaints? I mean really, just get on your knees, shoot mustard up your nose and let's call it a day. Alright?
fatman1970 25
You should still treat her with respect. Just because you have paid for her, it doesn't mean you can do whatever you please. You rent her, not own her!
doemetoch 28
You don't rent her, you pay for a service she provides. You don't "rent" an electrician or a plumber either, you pay them for a service.
Xamry14 10
My air conditioner guys company name is "rent a dude" lol. It kinda is like renting. You call them and they are at your house for a few hours, fixing something for you, then go home. Yeah. Pretty much the same as renting.
Ginwa 7
Still is considered as paying for a service.
T_Seg_101 18
That's the definition of needy... They should really have a help school for situations like this?
NostalgiaFreak9 43
I don't know if I should say YLS or YDI because I feel that there's more to this.
CogadhTallon 16
A call girl said she doesn't want op's money. You ever been kicked out of a store for being good for business? YDI all the way.
vikky538 29
We need a prequel to this FML
jimeple 12
Sounds like she's a rookie.
DeadxManxWalking 27
don't see how this is a FML, YDI
Algorithm 24
Yeah, no, there's a story behind this FML and OP's conveniently omitted it, probably because they did something douchey/scary/crazy to send her running. YDI.
waleedma 18
FYL.....
queerdragon 20
You have to be a certain type of skivvy person to have a call girl turn your down. YDI