Today, I got a lovely little surprise after I got out of the shower. That lovely little surprise? I got stung in the scrotum by a hornet that had decided to nestle itself inside the towel I was drying off with. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my clothes off for a shower at an RV campsite. I started running the water when I noticed there was a pack of hornets in the bathroom. I stood there, stark naked, waiting for a chance to get out, for four hours. FML
Today, I went to clean my roof when something buzzed by my head and a sting hit my neck. It turns out there's a small nest of, like, five hornets just chilling outside of my window. I found a dead one on the desk in my bedroom. FML
Today, while using a portable restroom at the park, I discovered all too late that some very hostile and territorial hornets had made it their home. FML
Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML
Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML
Today, I decided to sunbathe in my backyard in an attempt to be healthy. The result? Insect bites over my body. Somehow, despite being fully clothed the entire time, my scrotum also received several bites. FML
Today, I got back home to my completely locked-up apartment after a long and stressful family visit. On digging through my nice clean clothes for something comfy to change into, I was set upon and stung by a great dirty wasp hiding in there. How the fuck did it get in? Are there more of them in here with me?! FML
Today, after losing a battle with ants in my apartment, I just pulled one off that was biting me in the vagina. FML
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
Today, while I was in the shower, I noticed a short, black hair on my loofah. I ignored it and lathered up my entire body with it. When I put it back down, a roach crawled out of it. What I thought was a black hair was in fact its antenna. FML
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Top comments
doubleAbattery 0
OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!! I'm a girl and I still cried inside a little at the thought of that!!!
dacman48 0
Bee job?
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Comments (114)
KK_320 2
How doe a bee get inside, into a bathroom, then the bathroom closet, then inside a bag towel, then make a home there?!?! That's some smart bee!
laurlaurs 0
not everyone has a bathroom closet. maybe it was on a rag. and what normal person has a bag towel?
gotsparkly 0
Bugs get into the craziest places and get trapped. I don't think it was the hornet's idea to be there, but they're not bright enough to get out. What I want to know is how it got there in the first place.
rachelbrianna25 0
lol lovely little surprise? wouldn't have expected a male to write that. lol that sucks tho! = ( hahaha
triplethreat13 0
ok i'm a girl and i winced at the thought...hahaha your life sucks! hey, on the bright side, it'll puff up and make your nuts look bigger! :)
Shyman4ever 0
YDI for having hornets entering your house.
DeadMansCrack 4
DAYUM NATURE YOU SCARRY
djb23 0
look at that sonabitch go. that thing come by my house i kill it! that little rat lookin thing just got ate!
StopBeingADouche 0
ROFL! Omg, that's the funniest thing I've ever read on this site!
urmomsass 0
FYL that sucks ass, the second worst place, to, the worst being your dick hole, i flinched bad when i read this
Stellaritsmeg 0
How in the hell did a hornet get into your towel? How often do you shower?
coheedandcambria 0
You deserve it for coexisting with bees
doof_fisch 2
Congratulations. In 9 months you will be the father of the new Green Hornet.
bballn 0
omg lol dude that sucks