Today, I found out via Facebook status that my boyfriend is going to Hawaii with a group of friends, including his ex-girlfriend for a few weeks. When I confronted him about it, he said he didn't think I needed to know, and to mind my own business. I think I'm about to be single. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I logged on to Facebook to find that my boyfriend's relationship status had changed to being in a relationship with his ex. I asked him about it, and all he said was, "I guess I forgot to break up with you." FML
Today, I logged onto Facebook to find out that my boyfriend is now listed as single. News to me. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend added his ex on Facebook and Instagram, all within a few days. Lucky me. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because his wife found out about me. And by extension, I found out about his wife. FML
Today, I found out my fiancé is in a long distance relationship with his ex. Not only do we live on the same island, he's also my neighbor and my co-worker. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I found out he was seeing someone behind my back: my ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend is bringing his friends on our trip. I'm now the third wheel on the romantic trip we've planned for a year. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's Facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex-girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML
Today, I found out I was single by scrolling through Facebook and seeing my (now ex) boyfriend's relationship as "single." I was at work, in the middle of my shift. I haven't been electronically dumped since Middle School. He's 36. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend has a Facebook account. He said he didn't have one. Apparently he's not divorced after all. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Sounds to me like you've been single for a while already. Make sure you pack a few surprises in your ex-boyfriends bags, like dead fish. By the time he gets there, all his clothes will smell fantastic.
simcop2387 10
I wouldn't think I'd be about to be single. I'd make sure I was. If I ever did that to a girl I'd want her to break up with me because I obviously don't deserve her.
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Comments (276)
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Op's Boyfriend: What? I can't go to Hawaii with my friend and Ex without you poking your nose into my business? GTFO! And then Op bought a shark with a freakin' laser on its head at Wal-Mart for $10, rode on it's back to Hawaii, and had it fry her boyfriend, eat him, then regurgitate him onto his ex. Then she lived happily ever after with her Shark (with a freakin' laser on it's head) and son, Shark-boy. THE END.
fridabloman 3
Amen!
perdix 31
You've got nothing to worry about with your boyfriend and the ex-girlfriend. He'll probably just poke her a few times. You kids sure love The Facebook and such!
ddrocker23_fml 0
you don't deserve him. you are Better alone . you deserve better. dump his ass ! you should cut his fair in his sleep ;)
Pallywhack 4
How do you know what the OP deserves? Relationships usually fail due to a joint effort (or lack thereof).
Crazberry 5
Or some people are just douchebags :|
josephhaynes1990 1
Yeah but how often do people complain about bing win douchebags and do nothing about it? If this is the first time he's been a douche, they haven't been together long. People don't become douchebags overnight, and she should have been long gone then. So, it really was a joint effort then, yeah?
tony1891 22
I'm looking for a girlfriend.
Zmeilerr 22
Okay? This is not a dating site.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I'm looking for another talking chipmunk. I have more of a chance than you do!
KiddNYC1O 22
I like turtles. Can I adopt one here? No.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
... I have a mutant turtle, but it bit my brother, so now he's Turtle Brother. K' bye.
KiddNYC1O 22
You shall name him WannaBeangelo.
j_cat187 20
Do any of you guys sell pot?
kandi_kid69 15
That's what eHarmony is for.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
EHarmony isn't for buying pot! Facebook is.
ReesieBanana21 12
True that, bra!!!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Please stop talking to my bra.
wiseman2008 3
hope he finds out hes single before you do.
DazedSiren 5
Throw his shit on the lawn n light it on fire ^.^
Zaros_fml 24
Because that's not an immature over reaction...
Dezteny 5
Look darlin', I hate to break it to you but that's him not giving a **** if he's with you or not. More than likely though, he doesn't want to be with you at all, is just too chicken to break it off and wants you to instead. If (by the insane chance) I'm way off base here and he's just THAT much of an a-hole: That treatment is incredibly disrespectful and you should leave him anyway, because staying is validation that it's ok to treat someone like that.
toelie 26
He's a douche for saying that, but are you now just going to wait for him to dump you? Doesn't sound like much of a relationship. Regardless of how he feels, is this good enough for you?
bmxking210 3
Just get some road flares, tie them together, tape an old alarm clock to it, then put it in his bags. That should make it rememberable for him.
raraisbang 12
Better yet, get a real stick of dynamite or two. That will for sure ruin his day. ;D
893186506 11
*memorable
icallbullshit 3
Op before you may get dumped, show you won't stand for him hanging out with his ex, even if others are there, just leave him, you'll feel better before you know it!
Marteeny23 19
I thumbed you down because of your profile. Ignorance at its best right there.
icallbullshit 3
Ignorance or truth?
emba_fml 13
truth or a bunch of misogynistic bullshit?
emba_fml 13
truth or a bunch of woman hating misogynistic crap?