Today, I found out that to save on expenses, my wife booked a very small hotel room for ourselves and the kids while we visit Disney World. I've been officially cockblocked by Mickey Mouse. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife has locked herself in the bedroom crying because I said I didn't want to go to Disney for a vacation this year. We have been to Disney eight times in five years. Every vacation, it's Disney, Disney, Disney! I'm fucking sick of Disney! FML
Today, my husband and I had to cancel our family Disney World trip because my mom stole and gambled away all of our spending money. Our kids are still crying and throwing tantrums and don't understand why we can't afford to go anymore. FML
Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML
Today, I found out that my 2 week Christmas vacation my boss was talking about wasn't for this year, but 2010. I spent the day with my husband cancelling flights to Florida, and explaning to my 8 year old why we were not going to Disney World. FML
Today, I fulfilled my lifelong dream of going on a family trip to Disneyland. Less than two hours in the park, my kids have been scared shitless by every single character, they don’t want to ride any rides, my husband is drunk, and the mouse ears headband gave me a vomit-inducing migraine. FML
Today, my dad told me he's taking the whole family to Disney World, even my step-brother's girlfriend. But not me, because he can't "afford" it. FML
Today, I bought tickets to Walt Disney World for myself and my 6 year-old. She just announced she's afraid to ride an escalator, to the point of tears. FML
Today, we had to cancel a Disney vacation we had spent thousands of non-refundable dollars planning for over a year because our oldest son tested positive for COVID and we couldn't find anyone to leave him with on such short notice. My other kids are heartbroken. FML
Today, my wife took herself, the kids, and extended family members I've never even heard of to New York. She paid the 7,000$ bill with my credit card. FML
Today, I took my family to Disneyland. My husband had more fun than my five year-old daughter. He was hitting on the princesses. FML
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Top comments
FYLDeep 26
You're going to Disney World. It's supposed to be for the kids anyway. You can **** your wife when you get back home. No big deal.
unmadebed 0
seems like you were actually just cockblocked by your wife
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Comments (87)
skyeyez9 25
98: If you stay at home and care for a very young child and especially more than one, it is very emotionally and physically exhausting. If you have a child with serious medical needs, even more so. So sex (for awhile at least) is the last thing on the stay at home parent.
wonderful_wendy 0
well it is Mickey mouse!
stevenmx86 8
Actually I'd say it is your family that **** blocked you.. Mickey Mouse has nothing to do with your room arrangements..
Star18lk 0
i dont see how this is an fml. it's a family vacation and you dont need to have sex. your wife was smart, your only going to be in the room to sleep, the rest of the time you'll be out having fun. don't be so damn selfish.
k_madison 0
How Ironic Disney world is 'the happiest place on earth' but only for your wife and kids..and not for you. *Totally off topic but relatives and I went there last November and It was fun! we didn't have to rent a room cause my aunt's family lives in Orlando :D
k_madison 0
oops sorry double post.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
If you're going to Disney World, your kids are probably pretty young, and therefore too young to have their own hotel room. If that's the case, what did you expect? If they're old enough to have their own hotel room (in which case why are you spending hundreds of dollars going to Disney World?), then yes that sucks. But hey, Disney World is expensive; you want to save as much as possible. Just get laid when you get home.
mr_miyagi 0
dont you mean you were cockblocked by your kids? or maybe even your small bank account? but cmon dont blame it on mickey
alliede88 0
Disney is expensive but if you really wanna pay for sex give your wife the $500 the room upgrade would cost. she'll fit u in :)
EvilDave 13
Seeing as your wife seems to have decided that sex is no longer important in your relationship, it sounds like you need to get a divorce or a mistress.