Today, I took my family to Disneyland. My husband had more fun than my five year-old daughter. He was hitting on the princesses. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fulfilled my lifelong dream of going on a family trip to Disneyland. Less than two hours in the park, my kids have been scared shitless by every single character, they don’t want to ride any rides, my husband is drunk, and the mouse ears headband gave me a vomit-inducing migraine. FML
Today, the highlight of my day was a conversation about Disney, which ranged from Pocahontas lunch boxes to Disneyland Paris. I don't know who was more excited; me, a 20 year-old man, or the 6 year-old girl I was talking to. FML
Today, my family bet me $20 to wear a Disney Princess hat for the entire day around a theme park. I am 17 years old. We decided to go for lunch in one of the restaurants. After we finished, a woman gave my parents a leaflet on how to cope with disabled children. FML
Today, I was at Disneyland with some of my friends. While eating lunch, we watched a small child get frightened by the person dressed as Mickey Mouse. We all burst out laughing only to be jumped by Chip and Dale. Apparently I scream louder than the little kid. FML
Today, I went to Disney World. I fell and hit my head while jumping up and down to see Ariel. I'm a 35 year-old man. FML
Today, my wife has locked herself in the bedroom crying because I said I didn't want to go to Disney for a vacation this year. We have been to Disney eight times in five years. Every vacation, it's Disney, Disney, Disney! I'm fucking sick of Disney! FML
Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML
Today, I was working as a character at an amusement park. I was walking with another character and we went over to a baby girl. She smiled and laughed at my co-worker. When she saw me, she started screaming and crying. FML
Today, I tried being the 'cool parent' by taking my kids to a fancy, expensive amusement park, but ended up getting stuck on every ride and getting motion sickness. FML
Today, I was at Disneyland with a friend. We were watching the light show, and when Tinkerbell came out, we both started crying. Some guy noticed and called us "fucking pussies". FML
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Top comments
WCARlover 35
I'm sure those princesses see that way too often
aj9319 16
Some holidays you remember forever, like this one.
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Comments (83)
XmasaX 24
When you get home, hit on all his friends. And hit on male cast members too.
WCARlover 35
Your profile doesn't say your age but with your idea for revenge I can only assume you're about 12
splinteredApple 36
Don't fight fire with fire. Because then the other person will fight back, with fire.
devildog562 33
Everyone knows you fight fire with gasoline . The out come always is a spectacular blaze. Maybe get a big girl princess dress and make it a happy night for everyone
sunnyskys 25
#51 sounds good hey he's exploring what he likes it obvious he's into dresses and makup . wear it more often and he will be more interested in you
mmmxr 11
And then some more fire....
shemademedoit 20
or not talk to him. that's disrespectful and a sign that he may or has been cheating on her behind her back if he had the balls to flirt in front of his wife. I don't think he deserves royal treatment after that
booze_n_bitches 37
Find your new Prince Charming to sweep you off your feet, OP! He obviously isn't it.
eatmor2 9
You must've missed the part where that's her husband... You don't just "find a new one"
lyricalservant 21
#2 divorce for OP is a bad idea. They have a daughter together remember, her husband just needs a bat to the head to wake him up.
JKROB 16
@33 It is 2015, I am pretty sure she can go find a new one
JKROB 16
@34 You would rather stay in a toxic relationship and set a bad example for your daughter then split up?
DoomedGemini 38
As a daughter of a split couple, I really rather then split. It doesn't mean I don't love one of them or they don't love me, they just weren't right for each other. My dad found another woman who is right for him, and I don't mind at all. I understand being upset at first, especially if you're young, but it's kind of a selfish thing to expect parents to stay together JUST for a child. I think a lot of kids who had parents that do that WISH they had gotten a divorce because it's not healthy for anyone involved.
asdfghjklmoo 15
@34 If it is an unhealthy relationship, I would rather them divorce than cause the child to grow up in a toxic environment. I wished my parents would divorce. My mom has thrown things at my dad, she's locked my dad out of the house, she has bitched to me all about her in laws (almost everyday), tried to keep me away from them, she's even told me about their sex life. But... my mom says it is my responsibility to keep the family together and complains when I don't give her advice or care enough about it. That is such a heavy weight on a child's shoulder and I don't want anyone feeling how I did. However, if it is just the husband hitting on other women, perhaps this can be amended by a talk or marriage counselling.
smackaroonial 20
He can still be it. We don't know the whole story here. I honestly think it would be funny to try to catch the princesses off guard. My wife would be in on it too! Now what we wouldn't do, is hit on a normal person in the park that could take it as something more. But the princesses? Come on, it's all good fun.
WCARlover 35
I'm sure those princesses see that way too often
hamburgerjung 23
Exactly. But who wouldn't Hit on Cinderella?
meliodafool_ 15
#15 someone who doesn't want to experience a glass slipper to the groin.
kittysayshi 9
I feel sorry for those poor girls, they get that so often and it can be upsetting for them
PokeyPorcupine 18
Well sounds like you have a prince charming on your hands...
HarshD9619 34
Too bad he's busy charming other princesses
meliodafool_ 15
...when he should be charming his queen.
shemademedoit 20
charming? more like putting a spell >:)
Wsparta 26
the husband needs to give his wife the Royal treatment. OP'S husband is an ass.
dakatabg 31
Happy Family!
xJChristine 16
I hope you could have some fun with your daughter while he was hitting on the princesses, you definitely deserve it!
skye147 20
You should have found gaston and started flirting with him..
Themexicanbanana 6
thats a good example for the daughter.
NickVsHtml 14
Let it goooo !! Let it goooo !!
nothing92x 13
Bad attempt at sarcasm. I suggest that you "let it go".
aj9319 16
Some holidays you remember forever, like this one.
katydid91 31
"And that kids, is how I divorced your father!"