Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while watching my guinea pigs have sex, I got jealous. Yeah. It's been that long. FML
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Today, after assuring my best friend that his girlfriend would never cheat on him, I came home to my brother having loud sex with my best friend's girlfriend. FML
Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he thinks I'm cheating on him, with my brother. FML
Today, my girlfriend's guinea pig managed to go down her shirt. I have been dating her for 3 weeks and I haven't even kissed her yet. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of three years cheated on me with his ''sister-like friend." It's the girl I was always worried about, and half our arguments were about her. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend is cheating on me. With my mother. They were doing it for almost a year. FML
Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML
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Top comments
thaliah 15
Kick your brother's ass and dump the girl.
famvd 15
I'm assuming the squeaking sound is coming from the bed, not the brother...
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Comments (149)
Credibleskills 28
I still don't know what sounds like the guinea pig though
Fmlsea 28
its the bed that is making the sound . if you have enough sex and a cheap bed eventually will make squeaking noises when theres activity on the bed.
thelazyhipster 1
Ohh
revidffum69 22
Although it's messed up, apparently you weren't making her squeak, or you would know the sound, and she wouldn't be with him.
phatdaddy62 23
The bed was squeaking.
glabberfasted 16
Facepalm...
Witchylady 18
Now that really sucks. Sorry OP. Did you give the girlfriend the flick? As for your brother what a douche. One question though how did you confuse the squeak of a guinea pig with the squeak of the bed springs?
mkymouse90 17
So how long did it take you to figure out that when your girlfriends not in bed with you the guinea pigs squeak
ultra_notorious 26
sounds like he was railing her good!
bluefrootloops 13
So he was ******* her in your bedroom? Why else would you think it was coming from the guinea pig?
fatlard20 5
Now you gotta go **** your brothers next girlfriend.
CamKing 2
What do you expect... You own a Guinea pig.
Sirmrcrowley 12
Just spray a little wd40 on it. That should get rid of the squeak lol