Today, I found out that my friend's family has been using red paper to help his little brother with his potty training. "Aim for the red!" they would say to him. I guess today was a bad day to wear red pants. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML
Today, during dinner, my family had a discussion about the color of poop. FML
Today, my friends thought it would be funny to rub Tabasco sauce on my household toilet paper. FML
Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML
Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML
Today, after getting home from school, I realized I'd tucked my shirt into my underwear this morning. I'm fairly certain everyone got a good look at my lime green underwear. FML
Today, my brother got pantsed by his idiot friends. It was a surprise to everyone that he was wearing women's underwear at the time, but even more of a surprise for me that the underwear belonged to me. FML
Today, my brother dyed my white work shirt bright green because I beat him to the shower this morning. As it's my only shirt, I had to wear it to work, where there was a surprise audit and I was fired for incorrect uniform. FML
Today, my friend peed her pants while we were sledding. I could feel it trickling down into my pants. FML
Today, in an attempt to potty train my step-son, my boyfriend and I put underwear on him, hoping that when he peed himself, he would realize using the potty is the way to go. Instead, he peed while sitting on the couch, got up, took off the underwear, and then switched seats. FML
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Top comments
amadeclton 27
Don't you know that on Wednesdays we wear pink?
sharkgirl4 23
I think the bigger concern is that they have conditioned their child to think "Red=urinate". Hope he doesn't want to be a fireman when he grows up. Sorry about your pants OP.
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Comments (55)
sarah5745 41
Oh god.. Don't worry, he'll get there soon :) XD
matt721 8
Well I guess you had a shitty day.
Morning_fml 22
Not even close. -10 FML points for trying too hard.
lulinator 40
I don't think they tried at all.
RainTears 15
no guys, number 2 is right. OP must be pretty pissed off (that's how you do it o3o)
TheCookieComet 23
I don't think this was pun intended. What happened was pretty shitty.
DaRito 25
YDI for wearing red, that's never acceptable.
sarah5745 41
OP can wear whatever the hell op wants!
FluffyPandas156 13
You deserve a thumb down. How on earth does op deserve that. He/she wasn't expecting the kid to piss on his pants. Op thought it was only for the red in the toilet.
BoundBySpace 19
what #3 is implying is that pants shouldn't be red. It's his opinion.
Setareh23 34
Guys, I'm pretty sure #3 was being sarcastic...
Wakachulak 22
Seriously? Am I the only one to think red pants look ugly?
brittaaany_93 38
I think red pants are rad. But everyone has their own opinion :)
flyingmind_fml 17
i don't like red either
Fuaaad1994 31
Guess they're not so red anymore
Myo_fml 20
No, they're just a darker damper red now. That's how liquids work. pee doesn't magically dye things yellow.
MortenM 17
It don't?
sharkgirl4 23
I think the bigger concern is that they have conditioned their child to think "Red=urinate". Hope he doesn't want to be a fireman when he grows up. Sorry about your pants OP.
MrFloooo 18
Well, he would get the fires out...
lnheritance 19
Must be related to Bulls going for red. And targets are red; so target hits the "mark".
Enslaved 38
Funny thing is bulls are colour-blind. The red is just there for us. (:
love_struck97 19
People have different ways of potty training my cousins aimed for Cheerios in the toilet. Using red paper to teach him isn't a big deal
ShannonBitt 29
Are they flushing the red paper? That sounds like a clog waiting to happen, even worse if they have a septic system. It's not designed to break down like toilet paper.
ohSNAPyall 27
The flag is not just there for us. Waving the flag attracts the bull. The red is there for us, for theatrics.
thes7274473 19
That could have gone so terribly
thes7274473 19
"Why'd you piss in my cereal?!"
nhbasskid13 23
Don't get in such a pissy mood...
CoolCookie210 22
They really should have told you! Sorry, OP :(
caitlin547 13
What happened, number 1 or 2?
stewpididiot 11
they should put cheerios in the toilet... wait... the little nose miner would prolly pee in his cereal bowl...
amadeclton 27
Don't you know that on Wednesdays we wear pink?
lulinator 40
And you can only wear your hair in a pony tail once a week.
ThatDamHuntress 20
Or You can't sit with us.