Today, I found my old sewing machine I got when I was a kid. I never used it before, because when I was younger, I was afraid I might sew my fingers. Laughing at myself, I decided to sew up an old bag. I sewed my thumb. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was so bored, I sewed my name into my underwear. FML
Today, I lost a sewing needle in the carpet. No worries, my big toe found it. FML
Today, I was sewing a top. Due to a mistake, I had to unstitch the zipper and resew it. When I was almost done, I noticed that the zipper was upside down. FML
Today, I managed to staple my finger while showing my kindergartner class how to properly use one. FML
Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML
Today, as I peeled a now soggy Band-Aid off my finger, I discovered that in the dim light of yesterday evening, I had, with great anxiety, wrapped it around the wrong finger. FML
Today, I was halfway through a pair of pants I'd started making when my PTSD kicked in and I had a panic attack, and thought someone was yelling at me, so my response was to throw a pair of sewing scissors at the non-existent person. They hit the wall and now I have to get the wall patched up. FML
Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML
Today, I was so insecure, I got scared of what people might think of my fingers. FML
Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
nerdsgetmehot 23
Having had extensive sewing experience, I know that it takes a lot of recklessness to achieve the task of sewing your fingers. I'm sorry, but you were most likely being pretty careless...Hopefully you've learned to be a bit more careful!
rob935 5
I agree with 3. I have done a lot of sewing in my life and have never managed to do anything so stupid. YDI for being retarded. And to think, you were the fastest sperm!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (100)
christyxoxo 8
ironic isn't it, op? that must've hurt really bad :/
mR_StAtiiC 0
Ydi for not keeping your childhood fear. :)
Lindajuschtel 0
guess you made the right choice as a kid.
EvilDave 13
LoL..waitwhu... How did you do that?
ZachMitch1994 0
that's how grandma died :(
ChinnuWoW 0
lol your like a simpson... very smart when your young but then you get really dumb.
Bieberbabe89 0
Omg. I thought it said screwing!! that would be an odd gift to give to kid. well . . . fyl.
lovesoftball7 0
tht sucks but YDI for being dumb and not careful!!!!
ZeroIce 12
sounds like my grandma...
diabeticgirl 0
having a sewing machine and hand stitching you can't do that only if your hand stitching smart one