Today, I found my beloved hamster dead in her cage. Later that day, my boyfriend told me he already noticed that she was dead last night, but did not feel like telling me because he was afraid I wouldn't feel like doing it anymore that night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
Poor Mr Nibbles
Today, my mom wanted to surprise me by buying me a hamster. When I got into her car, I was actually surprised and even said, "Hi" to the hamster. When we got home, the hamster was dead. FML
Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML
Today, I got back home and my hamster was dead. I left notes two weeks ago everywhere to remind my parents to feed it while I was overseas. Apparently, my parents even didn't realize I was gone. FML
Alas…
Today, I put my hamster in his ball, and spent about an hour cleaning his cage. When I came back, I realized he wasn't even alive. FML
Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML
Today, I found out my creepy, obsessive neighbor got a pet hamster and named it after me. He has been telling all sorts of stories about his hamster using my name, and he just told me in detail how it died of heart attack. FML
Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML
Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML
Top comments
RedPillSucks 33
Sorry, I thought he had ****** the hamster to death or something for this to be in the intimacy section. Had to read it again to realize that he didn't want to be **** blocked.
Phustercluck 11
So sex is worth delaying your sorrow to him... It's one thing if this is an isolated moment of assholedom, but men who's actions are driven by their high value of sex could only lead to far worse situations of the same type. If you don't think it's that bad, pretend that instead of a pet hamster it's a pet dog or cat.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (41)
Sexywifey91 0
wow what a douche
IphonFML 6
If u guys did it that night, then smart of him. BUT im sorry OP that sucks...
JuliaM1000 10
It does, but your boyfriend is... a selfish jerk!! Wow... I'm also sorry to hear about your hamsters.
joeyohe 0
ydi for having aa terrible boyfriend i feel sad
6969awesome 0
18 it was one hamster and I enjoyed the fight the other day about u being stupid and ugly :)
Eamon666 3
When I saw your profile pic I though u had sliced your hand
bangscr3w 0
i woulda done tha same hahahaha....sorry bout the hampster tho...
mintcar 10
Haha. The hamster almost **** blocked.
ifyouwereasheep 0
lmfao
Lucidium 0
You laughed your '*******-ass' off? Goodjob.
chynab 0
lol Mi boyfriend said tht to his mom when we waz bout to do it she called him as soon as we started nd he goes mom ur cockblocking
MollyyMakeout 0
Hahahah. You're dumb.
Cinn_fml 23
Well, he's honest. Which is usually a good thing, but not always I suppose. Poor hamster.
RedPillSucks 33
Sorry, I thought he had ****** the hamster to death or something for this to be in the intimacy section. Had to read it again to realize that he didn't want to be **** blocked.
Johnny6speed2 0
That sounds about right. He knew you'd be upset over a stupid hamster. Now a dog or cat totally understandable if you got upset. But I wouldn't let a hamster mess up my chances of getting some tang.
El_patron 0
I ******* agree bro
Action_Bastard 0
Blame Hamtaro for this one.
foseberry3 0
ydi for having a hamster
j5p332 6
^^^ don't forget "beloved"
RedPillSucks 33
I thought you were talking about the movie "Beloved" with Oprah
bandgeek0934 0
If I were you I'd never be in the mood... with him ;P
breenntt 0
ahhh, men are jerks anyway