Today, I finally found out why my new co-worker has been shooting me dirty looks, being rude to me, and generally trying to avoid me. It's because I have blonde hair and blue eyes, and she thinks people like me are Nazis. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally found out why my wife always told me to never visit her at work. You see, my wife and I are dark haired with blue/brown eyes and our daughter is blonde with very striking emerald green eyes. You know who else is blonde with striking emerald eyes? My wife’s boss. FML
Today, my boss fired me because I look like her ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I was sent home from work because my new haircut "looks too much like Hitler's" FML
Today, I found out that ever since I got my blonde highlights, I've been mocked behind my back at work, and nicknamed "The Skunk". FML
Today, I got a coworker at my new job in trouble, because he kept harassing me and asking me out, even after I clearly told him I wasn't interested. Turns out he's very popular around here, and everyone now hates me for being a trouble-maker and not "taking a compliment." FML
Today, I found out why my coworkers never invite me anywhere. Apparently, I "made a face" when one of them used the N-word, and it makes them uncomfortable to be around me. FML
Today, at work, I was making an appointment for an old lady who told me, "You look like a movie star!" I started to thank her when she followed up with, "Like that girl from the horror movie! Your black hair and pale skin makes you look scary! Oh, sorry…" with the coworker I hate the most sitting right next to me. FML
Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML
Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML
Today, my boss told me I got my new job because she rejected candidates that seemed "too confident" or "too pretty." FML
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Top comments
justcommenting19 19
Wait, we're not?
thecodecat 24
That is unfortunate, but maybe you can have fun with it if there is no convincing them other wise.
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Comments (54)
Mr_Guy_Dude 17
How did you find that out?
friedpwnadge 25
Maybe it was the cries of "you bastard, you advocate the death of Jews, you sick blonde blue-eyed fiend!" that tipped OP off.
xxkrystalxx 14
Lol I'm curious too. Like did the coworker just tell her or tell someone else
thecodecat 24
That is unfortunate, but maybe you can have fun with it if there is no convincing them other wise.
thawny_fml 21
"I've told you I'm not a nazi at least nein times now, if you don't believe me I'll have to report you to the fuehrer"
tantanpanda 26
Whenever OP sees her in private, he could raise his hands and salute.
Lalala579121 28
Plot twist, the coworker is the actual Nazi. I did Nazi that coming.
justcommenting19 19
Wait, we're not?
BeautifulChaos27 37
Shhh! Don't tell them about our secret club!
Autistic_Slut 9
we must keep the organization a secret
Googolman 29
I'm wondering how you found that out.
sylvienoir 18
Shit, she's onto us.
1bj1234 12
I bet you did Nazi that coming.
LilMissCanadian 22
You forgot "I bet Jew"
RealSuperSand 21
Wow. The level of stupidity is over 9000.
higgysaurus 18
Why did you pick 9000 out of all the numbers you could have picked? I mean even 10k sorta makes sense
brenton490 19
Because nein thousand sounds better!
spacefish966 18
^^^^win
zombiekiller52 24
What 9000 that's impossible?!!?
Talonshere 14
@18 It's a meme. That's why he chose 9000.
9a_1z 12
A very old meme, it's shameful, he should hand in his license to meme. All your meme licences are belong to us.
Enkeria 30
Apparently #18 has never watched DragonBall Z.
Lalala579121 28
I'd almost say the stupidity is over 6 million.
higgysaurus 18
#36 shit, my bad
Cads1 24
That's the price you pay for being the supreme race..... Apparently.
Tamandua 19
Tell her you're Jewish.
higgysaurus 18
Why not just tell her "I am not a Nazi"? No sense in lying when telling the truth would be more effective
EvilLittleMan 23
Wear a KISS shirt...