Today, I filled out a 'perfect job placement' test, where you put down your skills, experience and education level and then it finds you jobs based on your abilities and areas of knowledge. No lie, the most compatible job they found for me was 'Dishwasher'. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got frustrated looking for jobs and decided to take a quiz on best-fitting careers. My results speak for themselves. FML
Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML
Today, I spent two hours filling out an online application and questionnaire for a potential employer. The application stated that there were no right or wrong answers and to answer truthfully. I was automatically rejected. FML
Today, I went to a job interview. I never applied for the job, they'd sought me out, had a phone interview, and sent samples, all before the face-to-face interview. Turns out none of the people I met with had even read my resume or writing samples. I was told I might not be a good fit. FML
Today, I filled out an application for a job at Dairy Queen. I handed my application to the manager along with my résumé, and he said he'd be in contact with me. Not even five minutes after I left, a friend who works there sent me a picture of my crumpled-up application in the trash. FML
Today, I found the perfect job, which would help me escape my super toxic in-laws and marriage. I have all the educational and other qualifications for it, and it is a permanent well paying job with the government. Too bad the recruitment process takes years to complete, by which time I might've offed myself. FML
Today, after months of searching for any kind of work, I finally received a call. It was McDonald's, but they said I was overqualified for the position. I thought they took anyone with a heart rate. Apparently not. FML
Today, my fiancé was offered a job by my boss working as a dishwasher. This is awesome, especially since he just got fired from his last job. When I brought it up, his reply was, "I don't want to work as a dishwasher." I guess beggars can be choosers. FML
Today, I have put in many job applications and had many interviews for a variety of positions all of which I am highly qualified for. Today, I heard back from all but one that I am overqualified. Welcome to Walmart. FML
Today, out of sheer boredom, I took a career personality test. The "best match" for me was the position of funeral director. Not only do I have a promising future with death, I got genuinely excited at how accurate the result was. FML
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Top comments
Kickmehard 0
Better start saving up for those fancy yellow gloves....
blalien 0
Don't feel bad, those tests are crap. My sister took that test, and she got, "professional bowler." She has never touched a bowling ball in her life.
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Comments (82)
hi_from_HI 0
Well somebody has to do it I guess!
dspadres 0
Sue them for gender stereotyping.
ned diggers 14
Found the mangina.
lynx_fml 0
I've known someone who got "cheesemaker". There were no dairy-related questions so I have no clue why that was even an option.
perdix 31
Oh, Mercy, you are missing the obvious opportunity! Glenn Beck and FOX News pay a lot more, you don't have to get the malaria shots and you get to meet a lot of batshit crazy people. Real revolutionaries are bores who only prattle on about their dogma and the other mercenaries are just ******. Besides, Blackwater (now Xe) is depressing mercenary wages, but providing good dental benefits.
Amphysvena 11
Well, you are a woman. It sounds pretty spot on to me.
imajinethat 0
#26 FTW.
HotSauce_fml 0
Hahahaha hahahahahahaha *takes a breath* hahahahahahahahaha!!
noidea_fml 3
when i took mine i got 'you are not suited for any type of employment.' thats kindof depressing considering how many types of employment there are and i got straight As on my gcses.. :(
bubber 0
I have two degrees in tech fields and mine told me I was perectly suited as a seasonal farm laborer. Now go wash the damn dishes and quit whining.
Blue_Coconuts 7
when I was getting out of the Army me and my buddies had to do all these classes to help us as civilians. One of them had us plug in our MOS and we would set up potential jobs that way. everyone was excited as they saw all these possibilites. My buddies and I put in ours "Infantry" and it said "No civilian equivilance.".... We were disapointed, and all they did was tell us to re-enlist.
lostfaithinpppl 19
Time to go acquire some skills? LOL