Today, I figured I needed to clean my room. I ended up finding my $135 calculator that I'd accused my ex-boyfriend of selling for gas money. That's also the reason I dumped him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked my mom if she'd seen my financial calculator on my way out to an exam. She told me she'd tossed it in the donation pile that she'd taken to the Salvation Army this morning because it was "clutter." I needed it to take an exam required to pass the class, to graduate next month. The only place to buy a replacement was closed. FML
Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML
Today, I was helping my mom look for some money she'd misplaced. At my wit's end, I flipped through her diary, in case she'd hidden it between the pages as she has before. Didn't find the money, but I did find out she might well be cheating on my dad. FML
Today, I went through the stuff that I'd left at my ex’s place and started unpacking it. I found a pair of another girl's panties. We broke up a little over a week ago. FML
Today, I called my ex-girlfriend to see if she would meet up with me so I could give her money to pay off the rest of the TV we had on layaway before we broke up. Turns out she cancelled it and took all the money I put into it. I put $500 down. FML
Today, I was cleaning my apartment when I found a €20 note underneath the sofa cushion. I was pretty happy until I remembered I'd lost €20 a few days earlier and spent an hour looking for it. I'd finally found my own money and felt lucky about it. FML
Today, I found out my ex bought a digital camera, an iPod, and a large flat-screen TV, all purchased with the alimony I'm paying him. FML
Today, I discovered that my parents rooted through our house looking for junk to sell at a garage sale. They sold all of my books from my bookshelf. When I freaked, out my mom said 'well you never read them'. There was about $300 hidden between the pages of those books. They made $60. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I got really excited when I got an email from a guy I've been flirting with in my math class. Turns out he thinks I stole his calculator and wants it back immediately. There goes my chance. FML
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Top comments
Stinkerbelle 15
Dumbass.
alwayswinning123 7
Looks like you owe someone a huge apology
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Comments (108)
Stinkerbelle 15
Dumbass.
LupeTabasco 5
*cough*bitch*cough*
KingCeltic77 18
That's my line.
SwaggCapone 11
YDI op for being a douche
LeFrogDog 27
proofs thinking before acting is a good tactic.
ZackST 6
Hang on... something doesn't quite add up here.
uhhSavage 22
It's a sine, OP.
AKGirlinSD 20
Unless OP's boyfriend stole from her before, she was too quick to accuse. Sadly, he could have been the best boyfriend she'll ever have. That's usually the case.
RaulGarcia30 10
Did anyone else read it in the guy from that 70's show's voice?
death943 10
Op seems to have sum problems and it really did cos her relationship. The tables are now turned.
FaguIous 22
Yeah OP, why would you accuse if you haven't looked for it?
random_person243 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
"You took my thing! were done! ... oh wait here it is."
HelenLFC 27
Wow captain obvious !
samasara 20
We're*
alwayswinning123 7
Looks like you owe someone a huge apology
eksyneet 23
I don't think OP's boyfriend, if he's in the right mind, will accept the apology. I mean, she called him a thief and dumped him before even bothering to look for her thing. that's a worrisome behavior...
AKGirlinSD 20
He might accept her apology but not take her back, in which, I don't blame him.
MoodyBlue320 11
This has YDI written all over it... Like way to "trust" the person that you're supposed to love. And even if it went missing, do you know how many times I've lost mine and them find it two months later in the most random-ass place? Even if he had taken it, break up, really? At least the guy dodged a bullet with you. God forbid, something of true value would've gotten lost, the poor guy might've been in prison..
BigShOtz07 5
Well, there is no relationship without trust, so maybe it was the best for both of you.
OuchAndGoodfight 5
When you can't trust someone because you trust yourself too much? I think the problem is an internal one. OP deserves shit.
fishstick557 14
Really seems like her relationship was based off of a material object... Material objects can't replace loved ones OP ydi
KingCeltic77 18
You should've checked first. You shouldn't be making accusations that you can't back up.
CheeseHater 23
I can't even imagine the stupidity on your part. "Yeah I think he stole my shit so I'm gonna break up with him". Somewhere I just feel you were looking for an excuse to dump his ass.
enormouselephant 15
There's a good chance it's happened before, which led OP to this conclusion.
Pleonasm 36
A fine example of why you should: -Not jump to conclusions -Tidy your shit
Demonfish 14
The shit doesn't necessarily have to be tidy, mine isn't, and I know where most things are, or at least the general area in which they can be found :)
andyyroxx 20
Pleonasm, you should've capitalized the TI, punmaster :'(
yeti37 16
How did you leave out that she is a calculating bitch....? (Maybe it was too far below you pun standard. Hope I didn't press your buttons by taking that pun)
TwinkleToesLOL 11
Don't jump to conclusions next time. :/
eaglerob 20
Messy, messy, messy
Meenah_fml 4
Here's where it all finally starts to add up.
verkaderk 9
I see what you did there...