Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I broke the news to my parents that we're having a baby. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "It's probably not yours." FML
Today, my husband and I announced at a family get-together that I'm pregnant with our fourth child. My dad sighed, and spent the rest of the evening acting moody, and eventually muttering about how he'd raised a "damned broodmare." FML
Today, after years of trying, I got the wonderful news that my husband is going to be a father. Too bad I’m not the mother. FML
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Top comments
amburrjade 28
It's begun. Welcome to 20+ years of Dad Jokes.
iipinkette 16
He has passed the dad jokes test, he's ready.
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Comments (75)
amburrjade 28
It's begun. Welcome to 20+ years of Dad Jokes.
Anti_Sora 31
*full life of Dad Jokes.
iipinkette 16
He has passed the dad jokes test, he's ready.
Awahso 25
Congratulations! Eh, he already has "Dad humor" locked down. Prepare for 18 years of terrible jokes and puns.
pedopears 18
Once you passed the Dad humor test, it will stay until death takes them apart.
amileah13 26
Aww, I think that's adorable. Congrats you two!
Tripartita 45
Oh, God, I just realized that's the type of joke I'd make. I need to… I need to rethink some things… or become a father.
gamermonster 34
I suggest the second :p
Anubis95_fml 10
Well you can be rest assured he will make a great father.
WinterChild 20
Just wait till he reaches the grandfather jokes level.
zach205 24
Grandfather jokes, aka dad jokes^2
dtdrpepperguy 14
So it begins....
Earths_Venus 25
KEEP HIM! That's hilarious!
darkmatou_fml 19
He was ready ! Congratulations ~