Today, I drove 45 min from my college to surprise my girlfriend with roses after she got off work. She responded by taking the roses, dumping them in her back seat, and speeding off because she couldn't miss Survivor. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I surprised my girlfriend with roses. She surprised me by getting back together with her ex. FML
Today, I drove three hours to surprise my girlfriend, who I hadn't seen in three weeks. When she opened the door, she gasped, told me to fuck off, and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, I drove for three hours to surprise a girl after surgery. My truck broke down outside her place, and it turns out she's over an hour away at her family's place. FML
Today, I had to drive my girlfriend to the hospital because she had a severe allergic reaction to the flowers I brought her. FML
Today, my girlfriend found an enormous rose arrangement in the back seat of my car. The flowers were from my fire chief to his wife. I forgot to deliver them. I now have to replace them since my girlfriend thinks I got them for her. The arrangement cost $225. FML
Today, I got off work early to go home and surprise my girlfriend with lunch, only to come home to her in the middle of packing up all of her stuff. FML
Today, I lit candles and scattered rose petals on the floor and on the furniture to surprise my girlfriend. When she came in, she sneezed uncontrollably because apparently she’s extremely allergic to these particular roses. The night ended with me driving her to the ER instead of dinner. FML
Today, I went to surprise my girlfriend, who was at work at Target, with flowers. I asked the employee at the entrance if she was there. When he asked who I was, his face lit up red and he started profusely apologizing, stating, “She told me you guys broke up.” before guiding me to her area. News to me. FML
Today, I drove three and a half hours to surprise my long distance boyfriend for our anniversary. He was out of town. Where was he? Three and a half hours away trying to surprise me. FML
Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML
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Top comments
juybuygo 13
that show is STILL on the air?
Lanceeden 12
DAMN IT DUDE OZZY SHOULD HAVE WON.
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Comments (117)
FiendHunter 19
This would be why you shouldn't date self-absorbed people. YDI
honest_abe69 2
priorities man
fantasyworld 39
People still watch Survivor?
iam2fat4u 15
I hope you cheating on her