Today, my daughter said she wanted to be vegetarian like me. Beaming with pride, I made her plant-based burgers for dinner. She took one bite, screamed, "EW!" and started crying and begging for beef burgers. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter came home from school crying hysterically. Apparently, her teacher is a vegan douchebag who told the whole class, "If your family eats meat, they're eating your future!" Now she screams when we eat meat. FML
Today, I told my younger sister that meat comes from cute animals like chickens and cows, hoping she'd want to be vegan like me. Instead, she laughed and made up a song about how chickens turn into tenders and cows turn into cheeseburgers. I ended up being the one who got upset. FML
Today, I got home to my daughter in tears because her dad decided 5 was the ideal age to tell her the chicken, bacon, and mince she eats every day comes from dead chickens, piggies, and moo cows. I now have a vegetarian 5 year-old and I’m seriously worried about malnutrition and stunted growth. FML
Today, even though I told my son I had vegan burgers for him, he brought enough vegan food for everyone at a barbecue, and tried to get everyone to try it. Not one person ate a damn bit of it, and he’s now crying, all while blocking our drive with his car. FML
Today, I made a tasty, healthy plant-based lunch for my family. They ate a few bites, spat it out, and then went to McDonald's "to eat real food, you know, food with meat in it." FML
Today, my daughters announced they had big news. They had a whole presentation saying they wanted our entire family to go vegan. When I told them, as gently as I could, that that was never happening, they burst into tears, screaming, "The planet is burning! Meat is killing us all!" They're 11 and 9. FML
Today, my 4 year-old son learned that burgers and chicken tenders are made from cows and chickens. I braced myself for the tantrum, only to hear, "They're yummy. Can we turn the cat into a burger? What do squirrels and dogs turn into?" Now I'm scared of my kid. FML
Today, after it appeared my daughter was throwing away any vegetables in her school lunch, I packed her all vegetables so she would have to eat at least one. Nope! She threw them out and complained to school that "mommy doesn't feed" her. I got a call from the school. FML
Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML
Today, I made roast beef with mashed potatoes and green beans for dinner. My 8-year-old daughter was crying and gagging the whole time, and eventually said between sobs, "Can't you just beat me and send me to bed hungry instead?" I have no clue where she got that idea from. FML
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Top comments
juggalo2 22
Children generally need to be exposed to novel foods at least three times before they will accept them. Perhaps start with a bite or two from your food, rather than expecting to convert her to a whole new diet at one go.
TomeDr 25
Honestly, I don’t understand why people want to make plant-based meat-like products. Just eat the veggies the way they are! Stop making them look like meat.
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Comments (3)
TomeDr 25
Honestly, I don’t understand why people want to make plant-based meat-like products. Just eat the veggies the way they are! Stop making them look like meat.
DLBL 23
Right! I was just going to say that! They hate meat, but still do that? sheesh.
juggalo2 22
Children generally need to be exposed to novel foods at least three times before they will accept them. Perhaps start with a bite or two from your food, rather than expecting to convert her to a whole new diet at one go.
JuneBleeds4 20
Or, don't try to force something on people and let them make their own decisions.
Yudith 28
Try the old Mexican Spice trick. Bring her a plant-based whatever, watch her go "EW", than take the plant-based whatever back and bring her the meat version of the same thing. No comment, no nagging, just switch. Soon she'll eat chili sin carne with the best of them.