jmac
United States
Today, I dropped a knife while cooking. Luckily it missed my foot, but only because it hit my knee. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
zztopspinner
United States
Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML
ouch.
Stamford, United States
Not my day, is it?
Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML
Anonymous
Seattle, United States
Today, I dropped my knitting project while I was sitting down, but I managed to catch it between my legs. So my knitting needles also caught me. FML
HarvestMoon_gal
United States
Today, I was cleaning a pan. I turned the water on, and it was super hot. My reaction was to slam my hand down. On a knife. So, not only do I have a burned hand, but there's also a huge cut on it from the knife. FML
Anonymous
Eugene, United States
Today, while showing off the sharpness of my new katana, I missed my target and hit my shoe. The strike cut into the second toe of my right foot, which then had to be amputated. Demonstration successful. FML
Eleanor
Leeds, United Kingdom
Slice of life
Today, I tripped and fell on my open dishwasher, right onto a carving knife. I'm mostly ok, except that my nipple has been sliced neatly in half. Seriously, the two halves keep flapping open like a little mouth. It would be funnier if it wasn't so painful. FML
Anonymous
Put it away
Today, I managed to cut myself twice with a Swiss army knife. Stabbed in one hand and sliced a finger on the other. Good to know it's super sharp. FML
Godzilla’s wife
Orange, United States
Fork off
Today, I was washing dishes after eating Christmas leftovers. I pulled a knife out of the drying rack and put it away to avoid cutting myself on it, yet I still managed to scrape my thumb on an errant fork in the sink. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, I was helping tidy up after my girlfriend's flat warming. I went to put a sharp kitchen knife in the sink while she was washing dishes, and stabbed her in the finger instead. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Spice
Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML
Top comments
punk6743 0
I used to cook, then i took a chefs knife to the knee.
PYLrulz 17
Ok, how many of those godforsaken "Arrow to Knee" jokes, or modified versions of it, will there be?!?
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Comments (137)
talarig 0
Oowww:/ that sounds like it hurt...but how did it manage to hit your knee..?
Jetgod56 7
Damn gravity! Or would it be gravyty in this case?
ShoobyDoo93 0
Protruding knees? Sounds like you've got bigger problems...
alstbv12 13
"And he stuck the landing!"
Snafuusmc 12
You were gonna cook but then you took a knife in the knee. I'm sorry I had to.
MoonPhase123 4
*Sigh* ...
VoIdemort 0
And then you wonder why I dislike your people. *SMW* (shaking my wand)
draegbomb 5
24-No you really didn't have to.
ScarletBloom 14
At least it wasn't your foot that got the cut. We have our knee cap to protect it from penetrating deeper.
sqeakyclean 7
Ah, yes. Throughout years of human evolution, the patella has developed for this specific reason. Thank God for kneecaps.
KrayKrayGurl117 7
I would suggest cooking with less sharp objects or working on your coordination...
ambamm135 7
....how would you cut any veggies, meat, fruit, etc without a share knife? Ever try cutting a tomato with a dull knife? It'll turn that tomato to mush not a slice.
NyteWolf 7
Yeah, cause chopping stuff with a spoon works real well.. :/
ambamm135 7
Sharp* not share -_-
sqeakyclean 7
Teehee, u silly:)
ambamm135 7
Be glad you didn't get hurt as bad as a fellow culinary student slice the tip of his pinky off cutting carrots. I still have nightmares :/ but I hope you're okay op!
megamandude455 10
He used to cook, until he took a knife to the knee.
TheTinyDuckling 4
Did anyone else think of a skyrim joke?
bananasquid21 6
No, you're the only one. (sarcasm)
Jkolbly 11
Tis only a flesh wound.
MsMeiriona 2
I'll have your leg!
PYLrulz 17
'Tis but a scratch.
ssnowywinter 0
What are you going to do? Bleed on me?
Squishypenguin 0
I'll bite your bloody ankles off!
bizarre_ftw 22
You've no arms left! Yes I have! What are those then? I've had worse!