Today, I got the bill for the flowers my husband arranged to be delivered to me while he's out of town next week. I also got the bill for the flowers he's sending to the floozy he'll be seeing next week while he's out of town. The gift tag for it was: "I can't wait to see you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Mrs Popular
Today, I sent flowers to my ex, scheduled to be delivered after work in the evening. She texted me at midday thanking me for the flowers. I looked at my shipping order and they haven’t been sent yet. FML
Today, I found a note in my boyfriend's car from another girl telling him she hoped he liked the flowers. These were the same flowers he gave me while I was in the hospital, just after having his kid. FML
Today, I received a bunch of flowers from my 'lover'. This would be fine, except that I don't have a lover, and my boyfriend now thinks I'm cheating. FML
So brave…
Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML
Today, I found out that the money my husband said he loaned to his "mother" actually went to the purchase of new lingerie for the woman he's cheating on me with. I just got the bill from the department store. FML
Bad timing
Today, I called my husband and he told me that he was going to invite his friend Jeff over that night. I told him I would prefer that he didn't come over. He took it to mean that I wanted to spend time with him and came home with flowers. Then had to tell him I was leaving him. FML
Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML
There's no such thing as a coincidence
Today, I ran into my husband and his mistress. He was picking her up at the airport. I was catching a flight to a conference with my boss. He had flowers for her, and his arm around her. My boss knows my husband as well. FML
Never enough
Today, my girlfriend returned home from a several week vacation with family. Instead of a happy reunion, I was terribly emasculated, publicly, for bringing flowers that "weren't as pretty as all the other couples' in baggage claim." FML
Today, I spent an ungodly amount of money to send my long-distance boyfriend a giant bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day. A few hours after making the non-refundable payment, he let me know we weren't going to work out, and that he was already sleeping with someone else. FML
Top comments
hottay7164 18
Leave his stuff outside for when he gets back/ yard sale and change the locks. Cheating sucks. If you are not happy just leave, but don't stay with the jerk, makes you just as bad.
Quaileggs 12
Send him a message or call saying "don't even bother coming home" and pack his shit up
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Comments (105)
hottay7164 18
Leave his stuff outside for when he gets back/ yard sale and change the locks. Cheating sucks. If you are not happy just leave, but don't stay with the jerk, makes you just as bad.
claudio117 12
Thumb me down for this cheating is bad and all but there is nothing that makes me more mad than people touching "my" (in your pov it's you) stuff and let alone selling it can't she just break up with him and save the unneeded punishments. And "makes you just as bad" why stoop to his level you're better than that
TimeDisposalEngi 14
Your comment was so difficult to read...
ravenevercross 19
I stopped reading when you said the house belongs to both of them, but his stuff only belongs to him. Not sure about where you're from, but where I live, if you get married, your spouse owns everything you do. As such, it wouldn't be a crime for her to break her own things. Anyways, pricks like him get what they deserve.
Iniezian 18
Sorry, but not this. Changing the locks and kicking someone out is ILLEGAL!!!
crazytwinsmom 25
Even in a community property state, anything a person had before the marriage is still their own. Only things acquired during the marriage are jointly owned.
jessi_sunshine 26
I think the best case scenario for OP would be to hire a really good lawyer and get a divorce. The courts don't usually look favorably upon cheating scumbags. My guess is that he wouldn't get half of everything, and even if he did, there's always alimony.
SpotDog 11
@ #55 Maybe - but oh so satisfying when you make the point and cut your losses.
gidgiddonihah 11
#63 I would like to agree but I know the courts have not been kind to my aunt in her ugly divorce. He cheated on her and has, on multiple occasions, not taken her kid home when he was supposed to, filed false information, and at one point he slapped her hard enough it left a bruise for days. When the police arrived they were both arrested (she shoved him after being hit). After 9 months she finally divorced and was allowed to keep the house and kid but had to give up most of her belongings (including their cars) . Now he is trying to get another trial as his lawyer sucked and was just disbarred (he advised my ex-uncle? to do illegal things, filed everything late and incorrect, and on a few occasions never showed up for court). My aunt paid 11K USD to get divorced the first time and is not sure she can afford another trial. The judge is seriously considering trying the entire thing over again.
Murilirum 23
There's, no solid proof of cheating. If he's going out of town it may be a positive impact to an executive. Not likely, but that's what I took from that.
jessi_sunshine 26
Because when I go out of towns to see my boss, I send them flowers and a card saying, "Can't wait to see you." How about no?
Quaileggs 12
Send him a message or call saying "don't even bother coming home" and pack his shit up
SerendipityRose 26
Don't forget to ask if his piece on the side will come pick it up off the lawn or if he'll be doing it himself.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Forget that! Just have a bonfire.
Dusty_Busters 15
I like your picture
n4ture 20
don't even bother packing his stuff. just throw it away.
Senseless_487 29
You spelled "scumbag" wrong.
Wizardo 34
Sounds like he's gonna be going asexual for a while whilst beating off his own stamen...
AceofHearts96 10
Except that Asexuality is a valid sexuality and not just something you 'turn for a while'.
JoeGrant 12
Simply leave a note on the door with a phone number to the divorce attorney. You should not have to see him ever again, unless it's in court.
SirTalkaton 22
Personally deliver the flowers to her yourself, then lay the smack down on both if them! Sorry OP, cheating is douchebag status at the highest level.
Pordexel 5
Her? I don't mean to be rude but it was the husband who was cheating.
hunteryager 18
I think he was referring to the "floozy" the husband was seeing while he was out of town.
theunbeatableram 3
No, just deliver the flowers to her, explain how you two are married, and the floozy will be mad too! Both of you give him the smack down!!
middleagednurse 22
Send him flowers to his hotel with the message " congratulations on your divorce"
rg350dx 29
Send him a bouquet of flowers with a letter from your attorney attached to it saying, "I can't wait to divorce you."
jessicadarcyd 4
Don't call her a "floozy" she might not have any idea about you, either.
ajnorma 16
I agree with 11. I slept with a guy after dating him for a while, the next day I get a message on facebook calling me a ***** for sleeping with her boyfriend. Didn't have a clue this girl existed. If this girl does know then that's a different story and you can plan your revenge accordingly.
jessicadarcyd 4
I have been there too, luckily I didn't hook up with him yet. But it caused a lot of problems. That asshole.
crazytwinsmom 25
Me too, twice, and I dumped them as soon as I found out.
VeganVampyre 27
Same here. I found out the guy I was seeing was already taken when I got the longest text I've ever seen, from an unknown number. She called me a **** faced ***** for trying to steal her boyfriend and ruin their relationship, among many other things. It was horrible. So don't go too hard on the "other woman" because it's the man who decided to cheat and the other woman probably has no clue. Unless you know for a fact that she does know and she is trying to steal him.
alligator729 15
Well I can't wait until you break up with his cheating ass.