Today, I did a bike ride and run with a gent I'm serious about. On the run, I had a big lead until he passed me up saying, "I'm going to marry you." Puzzled that he would propose and then sprint away leaving me trailing, he clarified at the finish. His words: "I'm going to bury you." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at our wedding, instead of saying "I do", my fiancé paused before saying, "I can't do this", stepped down from the altar and proposed to my maid of honor. When she obviously refused, he ran from the venue bawling. He's not returning my calls. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me during a funeral. FML
Today, I watched my fiancé ride off on my motorcycle with another girl. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a massage. I guess I hit the spot, because he muttered, "Please marry me" into the pillow. Considering we've been going out for years and had spoken about marriage before, I stopped in my tracks. He stammered, "Oh, I mean... Not like that. Will you keep going?" FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house to break up with him. When I got there, I got sent on a scavenger hunt that ended with him proposing to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML
Today, I went on a jogging date with a guy I'd been on a couple of dates with. I was a little worried that I wouldn't keep up, but I did and everything was fine. Or at least I thought so. After we'd finished, he dumped me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went for a ride on bicycles. After a while, I couldn't see him ahead of me any more. I went back and forth for half an hour but could't find him, and started to think something happened. I went home to call him but saw his bike. Turns out my boyfriend is just an asshole. FML
Today, while talking on the phone with my long-distance boyfriend, he let me know that he was getting married in August to "some girl" for his papers. After I objected, he told me, "Well, you can marry me if you want." I'm not sure if I just got dumped or proposed to. FML
Today, while running, I sped up to show off for a cute female runner I'd seen before up ahead. I passed her and not more than a minute later she sprints past me. I couldn't catch up. She not only out ran me, but waited to tell me it was a "nice try." FML
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Top comments
fooltemptress 36
There are many that would argue marriage and a funeral are roughly the same thing.
Welshite 40
#3: Are you kidding? When I race a girl, I make sure she loses. That way I get to show off my physical athleticism and can comfort her after her loss. It's a win-win. At least, it's what I would do if I ever got the chance. *weeps*
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Comments (50)
angelitared 27
Get your head in the game and out of the gutter.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
I don't think that thinking a guy is proposing counts as having your head in the gutter...
fooltemptress 36
There are many that would argue marriage and a funeral are roughly the same thing.
DocBastard 40
Sorry to say, but he must not like you very much. If he were seriously interested, he would have let you win.
jillytc 23
that's not totally true, maybe she likes a real competition, I mean I know I do. Not all girls want the guy to play easy for them
Welshite 40
#3: Are you kidding? When I race a girl, I make sure she loses. That way I get to show off my physical athleticism and can comfort her after her loss. It's a win-win. At least, it's what I would do if I ever got the chance. *weeps*
EverestMelting 23
Only losers let their SOs win. Oh wait...
DocBastard 40
It's the gentlemanly thing to do. My apologies if I still believe in chivalry. Either that or it's a sexist joke. I can't remember.
Das_is_gud 11
What, doc bastard got down voted
gracehi 33
I hate it when men *let* me win at anything. It's one thing if I beat you at something I'm good at, but don't deliberately and obviously do realy poorly at something I suck at. It insinuates that you think I'm such an immature person that I can't handle losing a silly game.
Rallred32 20
When I race a girl, I make sure I win. I mean, do you know how many guys would make fun of you for that? A lot. And then afterwards, I could comfort her by going on a date.
Welshite 40
#25: Remember to cite me properly next time.
spekledworf 18
I'd never want a guy to let me win. I don't exactly think that's chivalrous, it's embarrassing.
caro1ina48 13
I like to consider myself a southern gentleman, a very chivalrous man, and I would never let the woman win. My wife wouldn't want me to win either
DocBastard 40
I see that no one can take a joke today. Very well.
Fermion 20
I've read a book where if you're mean to her she'll sleep with you.
NeatNit 33
#34, today is a very serious day. Haven't you heard?
xBethanyC 15
I don't like people letting me win. Once I was playing pool with a guy and I noticed he was letting me win, so I stayed being overwhelmingly sarcastically awful. then he started doing the same. It became a battle of who could lose worse, which was surprisingly fun
djkazic 5
#32 so you wear a fedora.
8born8 18
39. I just had a mental image of Peter Griffin singing surfin bird by the trashmen.
doctorhook86 25
Upvoted #3 because apparently at least 72 people here are oblivious to sarcasm.
CarbonCoach 11
Sorry to say but I really can't understand, someone care to explain step by step what happened. Was s/he shocked that he was going to propose? Gent means gentleman right or just guy? I'm lost...
DocBastard 40
He didn't say "marry you", he said "bury you" as he was passing her. And a "gent" is a type of talking goat from Namibia.
TunaFireStarter 16
In Nigeria they arrested a goat for robbery after several people saw it transform from man to goat. Perhaps that was one of these "gents?" :)
laurenasabutton 26
Yes she was shocked, shocked enough that he managed to overtake her. Gent is short for gentleman, so im assuming she just means he's a nice guy.
gingaa96 18
To answer your real question. Yes gent means gentleman and she misheard him when he said he was going to bury her.
joeyl2008 29
So this is an FML because you misheard him?
Carebeareatu 23
Maybe he changed what he said to throw you off your game? Looks like it worked.
AyeJay101 25
It's possible, but what if OP said it in a pissy way and he tried to play it off as a joke to not have OP pissed. Too bad, it would've been cute if something like "I'll marry you if you beat me" was said :)
perdix 31
If you accept the "til death do you part" bit, they're kinda the same thing.
buckdharma 38
He wants to tie the knot around your neck.
bubblyhayley 16
it was a joke, relax n also hardly a proposal!!!
isallwaysme 27
not really an FML, oh my god you misheard him, nothing bad happened.