Today, I decided to make myself a nice meal. I bought expensive pasta and sauce etc. It looked delicious, I decided the finishing touch would be some parmesan cheese. I grabbed the bag and threw a handful of cheese on my meal. The cheese was about 98% mould. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I made homemade pasta from scratch. I spent hours kneading the dough, rolling it out, and cutting it into perfect strips. When I went to cook it, I realized that I forgot to add salt to the dough. The pasta tasted like damp cardboard. FML
Today, feeling too lazy to cook dinner, I bought a bagged salad from a low-end store. I dumped the contents into a bowl; the first thing that fell out was a dead mouse. Bon appetit. FML
Today, I was having a cheat meal after two weeks of strict dieting. When I opened the pizza box, I saw a cockroach. It had been baked into the cheese. FML
Today, I was halfway through eating a what I though was a delicious sandwich, when I turned it over and saw nasty green mold on the bread. FML
Today, while on break from work, I went to the cafeteria and bought cheese cubes. One of my coworkers, who is usually very pleasant, asked to try some and I said yes. She ate all the cheddar cubes in the bowl, which are the only ones I like. I wasted $3 for someone else to eat my food. FML
Today, I came home tired and hungry from work. I put my feet up and sat down with a big bowl of chips and salsa. I thought I must've been really hungry because my regular no-name salsa tasted way better than usual. I looked down to examine the jar. Looks like I like the taste of mold. FML
Today, I went to work. All day, all I wanted to eat was my favorite cheese, which was waiting for me at home. I came home and someone had eaten it, then put the empty wrapper back in the fridge. FML
Today, I was making one of those microwavable pizza kits. Realizing I had no crushed red pepper to put on it, my mom suggested using a chili pepper she had dried. Thinking it was a great idea, I cracked it open on my pizza and out popped some fuzzy white mold and two maggots. FML
Today, I decided to have some bagels. It was only after I ate them that I looked at the cream cheese and discovered that it expired 3 years ago. FML
Today, like many other days, I got up to make breakfast before dawn. Not wanting to waste food, I took apart a chicken that looked fine, cutting away some of the breast for a burrito, only to realize after I ate it and went to throw out the bony bits, it was completely moldy underneath. Penicillin, anyone? FML
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Top comments
DynamicDave 11
Actually, it was 100% mold. That's what cheese is.
Occums_Razor 0
You shoulda checked.
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Comments (138)
rxxk 0
YDI for spelling mold wrong.
strata8 0
Idiots. American English isn't the only English dialect in the world. Get out of your holes.
Stumblebum30 5
what idiots think cheese IS mold.. it's not! except for Blue cheese.
LazyMew 0
To ALL people who keep saying that "mould" should have been spelt "mold": "mould" is the British English spelling whilst "mold" is the American English spelling. As the OP is a British I don't understand why some of you whined that the "mould" is spelt wrongly.
DirtyDiana_fml 0
I hate the posters on FML just bash someone about how expensive his food was. **** off. Sorry about your meal.
somela 0
The FML here is that you cant spell mold...
Person1233 13
Mold = Mould, now STFU.
Ren_Eah 0
I love reading the comments because there are always a ton of people that are really just unintelligent. Seriously, would it kill anyone to learn how to spell? For example, it isn't "spelt" it's "spelled." #34 THANK YOU! Really? Really? Did someone actually think that the American dialect of English came first? *rolling eyes* Don't be ridiculous.
LazyMew 0
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_irregular_verbs http://www.usingenglish.com/reference/irregular-verbs/ Both "spelt" and "spelled" are acceptable. Just my two cents.
tikimuppet 11
@58 I really wouldn't put it past some of the idiots out there to not even know that English is from England.
marisela906 0
Ew!
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somefacts 0
I love how some people believe they are superior because they point out spelling mistakes. Sadly typos exist as well as misspellings which is one of many reasons editors exists- mistakes. Many mistakes cannot be directly attributed to intelligence despite what ego may throw together in an effort of self-preservation. However, on the point of just dialects, the different modern dialects evolved at several different times and there is not one American or English dialect many evolving in the centuries since America's founding and fading from existence. In fact several can be attributed back to certain parts of England and actually are better preserved (which really isn't much) in some cases then other English dialects, so one may say it came earlier.