Today, I decided to make myself a nice meal. I bought expensive pasta and sauce etc. It looked delicious, I decided the finishing touch would be some parmesan cheese. I grabbed the bag and threw a handful of cheese on my meal. The cheese was about 98% mould. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I made homemade pasta from scratch. I spent hours kneading the dough, rolling it out, and cutting it into perfect strips. When I went to cook it, I realized that I forgot to add salt to the dough. The pasta tasted like damp cardboard. FML
Today, feeling too lazy to cook dinner, I bought a bagged salad from a low-end store. I dumped the contents into a bowl; the first thing that fell out was a dead mouse. Bon appetit. FML
Today, I was having a cheat meal after two weeks of strict dieting. When I opened the pizza box, I saw a cockroach. It had been baked into the cheese. FML
Today, I was halfway through eating a what I though was a delicious sandwich, when I turned it over and saw nasty green mold on the bread. FML
Today, while on break from work, I went to the cafeteria and bought cheese cubes. One of my coworkers, who is usually very pleasant, asked to try some and I said yes. She ate all the cheddar cubes in the bowl, which are the only ones I like. I wasted $3 for someone else to eat my food. FML
Today, I came home tired and hungry from work. I put my feet up and sat down with a big bowl of chips and salsa. I thought I must've been really hungry because my regular no-name salsa tasted way better than usual. I looked down to examine the jar. Looks like I like the taste of mold. FML
Today, I went to work. All day, all I wanted to eat was my favorite cheese, which was waiting for me at home. I came home and someone had eaten it, then put the empty wrapper back in the fridge. FML
Today, I was making one of those microwavable pizza kits. Realizing I had no crushed red pepper to put on it, my mom suggested using a chili pepper she had dried. Thinking it was a great idea, I cracked it open on my pizza and out popped some fuzzy white mold and two maggots. FML
Today, I decided to have some bagels. It was only after I ate them that I looked at the cream cheese and discovered that it expired 3 years ago. FML
Today, like many other days, I got up to make breakfast before dawn. Not wanting to waste food, I took apart a chicken that looked fine, cutting away some of the breast for a burrito, only to realize after I ate it and went to throw out the bony bits, it was completely moldy underneath. Penicillin, anyone? FML
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Top comments
DynamicDave 11
Actually, it was 100% mold. That's what cheese is.
Occums_Razor 0
You shoulda checked.
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Comments (138)
imabout2crash 0
cheese is mold
canttouchthis91 0
you spelled MOLD wrong asshole!
Jarl_the_Elite 27
Mold is spelled mold in America but it's spelled mould in England. Same as color and colour. Don't call people assholes for using a different but still correct spelling.
harbinger46 6
All the US dumbasses calling him out for spelling mould wrong - THAT'S HOW YOU SPELL IT IN ENGLAND. We invented the language, you're the people spelling it wrong!
Jarl_the_Elite 27
In America we decided to not use the silent u in many words.
dinosaursateme 0
IT'S MOULD, SHE'S ENGLISH, RETARDS.
jessicak2113 0
Just for future reference it's spent mold
Jarl_the_Elite 27
How you used spent is spelled 'spelled'
Leftieswillrule 3
it was mould? Mould out of what? or moulded into the shape of what?
Kayaker96 3
It's mold. Ftr
electric_waffle 6
Lol just scrape the shit off :|
KevinFlynn 13
haha
Jarl_the_Elite 27
Cheese is naturally 100% mold because cheese is mold.