Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home to my 60-something year-old father, stoned off his ass, buck naked in our living room, doing a spirited rendition of "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" with an Australian accent and a tambourine. The windows were open. The poor neighborhood children will most likely need therapy. FML
Today, I've been trying to find and revisit a song that my dad listened to all the time when I was a kid, and I finally found it. Except now I'm old enough to realize the lyrics are about a psychotic man who gets put in a "home" for things I cannot put in here. FML
Today, I saw my dad sitting in the car alone, blaring classical music, blowing up beach balls. FML
Today, my dad has been hitting the bottle, and will only respond to anything I say in a slurred rap. FML
Today, as I was hung over from a concert and refusing to get out of bed, my dad decided to hook up his top notch speaker system and play Christmas music that shook the house. It's July. Let the family weekend begin. FML
Today, my son finally revealed the reason he was always blasting music as a teenager was to drown out the sound of his father and I arguing. FML
Today, I told my dad that I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. He responded by blaring sad breakup songs as loud as he could throughout the house, just to see me "cry like a bitch". FML
Today, I came home to find my drunken father sitting on our front lawn. He had a blanket, lit candle, and was singing with his eyes closed. He told me he believed he was Buddha from watching the history channel. Meanwhile, cars were driving by our house beeping, and yelling "praise the lord!" FML
Today, I came home to find my dad's mid-life crisis has finally started. He's blacked all our windows, barricaded the door to the backyard, and set up a bunch of security cameras in and out of the house. It seems he's been reading up on Survivalist and Masonic conspiracy theory bullshit. FML
Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML
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Top comments
imafmlluver 6
MY GOD U SUCK skrillex ftw
kickazz16 15
It's probably a mid-life crisis. But do know your dad heard you wail and scream for hours when you were a baby. Just adjust to it!
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Comments (679)
bizarre_ftw 22
So I take it you don't like Skrillex? Easy fix, hide his CDs and blast classical music
Prometheus217 6
lol skrillex is good stuff to electro fans. don't hate on the artist.
kittykatt666 0
Eat shit. Skrillex is chill AF
RyNo24 4
Don't hate on dubstep...
psychwardnurse 0
You think that's a psychotic break? HA!!!
dreawlkr523 0
Skrillex is amazing.
gamefreakpog 5
I thought dubstep was diarrhea pouring into a gutter.
atamaga 0
Skrillex isn't bad music. It's okay if you don't like it but it takes skill to do what he does. Let's see you be as successful.
kansah 25
Yeah.........skill.....
krc093086 8
You obviously have no taste in music then. Skrillex is awesome. Your dad is cooler than you dude
THE_A_TEEN 28
Because ALL of the other AMAZING songs out there are not that great and listening to them equals a bad taste in music, right? Moron...
KillTheNoise 0
Seriously, skrillex isn't the only dubstep producer around. There are so many better producers like Dr. P, Flux Pavilion, Cyberoptics, Liquid Stranger, Excision, Noisia, Zeds Dead, and Downlink just to name a few. And for the record, skrillex is a terrible dj. He presses play, smokes his cigarette and trys to act busy. In regards to the FML,fyl. Your dad is rolling balls, give him some water so he doesn't dehydrate. And if you ever wondered if you're adopted, now might be the time to ask :]
KillTheNoise 0
And Rusko! How the **** did I forget to add Rusko?! Dude is a beast!! Probably my favorite 'stepper right meow
krc093086 8
You are obviously one of those who has never seen him live. He's the shit. Quit going on YouTube to look at videos of him so you can sound like you know what your talking about
KillTheNoise 0
I actually did see him live at a rave in 2010 with Fukkk Off (who's awesome btw). Skrillex crashed several times and after that he kinda just stood around occasionally pressing a button lol