Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after having my car been broken into the day before because I didn't lock it, I made sure I locked my doors. When I got off shift and entered the parking lot, I noticed a brick had been thrown through my windshield and a note that said, "Nice Try". FML
Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML
Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read, "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML
Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Today, I went out for New Year's. When I got back, I found my house had been broken into. I found a note saying, "Happy New Year, sucker." FML
Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML
Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML
Today, I went downstairs after a family argument. The front door was kicked in, the sink faucet was snapped off, and there were broken plates all over the kitchen floor. I later found out that the argument was over who left the refrigerator door open. FML
Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML
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Top comments
StarWolf111 21
You should get a new housekeeper...
stormstarcj 12
Maybe she was in on it...
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Comments (102)
StarWolf111 21
You should get a new housekeeper...
Redoxx_fml 22
"Ah no no no..."
NoMore_CoolNames 14
I no close door
jillytc 23
it's so hard to find good help these days
scooterdude720 19
As the saying goes, "If you want something done right, do it yourself." Time to get to work for you OP.
Gingerette 8
Obviously, mr. superman was no here when the house was being broken into.
stormstarcj 12
Maybe she was in on it...
Redoxx_fml 22
"We need more lemon pledge."
Axipiter 24
It's a trap!
LilFlutter 10
I had a neighbor once who had that happen. It was pretty obvious that it was an inside job because it looked like they used a key and they knew just where the expensive stuff was kept. Really sad, especially since he was an older widower.
Bano360 25
A noooooo, you leave open.
Redoxx_fml 22
"No no I clean.."
Likian5 26
I'd have your housekeeper pay for the losses if you can.
jw90 18
No no you pay.
patrickalamo 48
Let's hope the housekeeper is with a bonded company.
ShakeDisPlace 10
your house keeper probabiy went to go get more lemon pledge.
Bano360 25
A nooooo, you buy.
Redoxx_fml 22
"This is the store brand it's just as good!" "Ah no no, it leave a film."
SomeRandomGuy15 18
Do we need the "No, no..." Joke in every comment thread? :/
Axipiter 24
Noo, you joke.
Pauschinator 22
The housekeeper did it.
Debragga99 6
No no, she no do it
metalhead4740 14
Maybe your housekeeper was so excited for GTAV that he/she left the door open...in excitement...
zBLAKEz 23
I knew it was just a matter of time until the talk of GTA V hit fml.
metalhead4740 14
Yep...times up...
Redoxx_fml 22
At least she didn't pretend that her grandmother died.
sythe511 28
****! College costs so much that I can't even afford to buy the game.
ryanthecheeseguy 18
You mean your FORMER housekeeper.
vipirius 18
There's always THAT guy...
vipirius 18
There's always THAT guy...
ryanthecheeseguy 18
And there's always the double poster
Spider_Web 11
I hate double posters
Spider_Web 11
I hate double posters
domking1315 20
It took a second to see what you did there. Clever
gentrysu 10
Batting your eyelashes gets you two double posters!
mrzombielot 8
Then you don't have a very good house keeper.
zandalee 20
DO NOT USE YOUR TOOTHBRUSH
MortenM 17
Yeah. Sack her ass immediately. Nice of the burglar to tell you how to avoid it another time though. what a gentleman